


Trust Me

by roamingaustenites



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Caretaker Kylo, F/M, Gentle Kylo, Modern AU, Poor Rey, Sick Rey
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2018-09-25 19:19:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 31,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9840440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roamingaustenites/pseuds/roamingaustenites
Summary: What happens when Kylo finds something abandoned?  He adopts it, of course.





	1. Lost and Found

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't get this story out of my head, so I decided to write it out! I hope you guys like it!!

Kylo was walking out of his apartment complex like any other day to go to a job that he hated, surrounded by people he couldn’t stand.  Outside it was pouring, souring his mood even further.  He could see his breath curling around him.  He reflexively pulled his jacket closer around him, flipping up the hood.  He stepped in the rain after briefly glancing around.  He caught something out of place in the corner of his eye.  He turned towards it, noticing it was a pile of slopping wet cloth.  He warily approached it, not really sure what to expect.  The closer he got, the more he realized it wasn’t just a pile of cloth, but an actual person who had covered themselves in the cloth in an effort to keep the rain off, while huddled close to the side of his apartment building.  Kylo was more confused than ever.  Why would someone want to huddle up in a bunch of soaking wet fabric?  And what was he supposed to do about it?  His mind was screaming at him to leave this clearly crazy person alone, but his body kept pushing him forwards, drawn to the small figure he could make out in all the cloth.  He stopped a few steps away, drawing a blank as to what to do.  He had to be at work soon.  If this went on any longer, he’d be late, and his boss hated tardiness more than any other fault.  

 

Not knowing what else to do Kylo called out a small, “Hello?”

 

There was no response or movement from the tangled, dirty cloth covering the small figure.

 

“Hey.”  A little louder and sharper.

 

Still no response.

 

Kylo huffed in frustration.  “Hey!”  He shook what he assumed to be the shoulder of the figure, but felt more like a hip.  Nothing.  Kylo was getting worried.  What if someone had dumped some corpse on his sidewalk, and now he would get framed for murder, because _of course_ he had to touch it like some freak.  Rain was running down the back of his (thankfully) waterproof jacket.  Deciding to throw caution to the wind he pulled back a flap of the soaked fabric and let out a soft gasp at his discovery.  Beneath the dirty fabric was the most stunning young girl, barely a woman, he had ever seen in his life.  Her light brown hair was soaked, sticking to her face and neck.  Her pale skin had a golden glow.  Her soft, slightly chapped pink lips were parted, with small huffing breaths escaping between them.  Kylo was riveted on her face.  He couldn’t tear his eyes away.  Her eyes were still closed, peaceful, almost as if she was asleep.  After a while, Kylo started to feel how cold it was in the rain, and the girl still wasn’t responding.  He started to worry, wondering how long she had been out here in the freezing rain.  He looked around to see if anyone else was around.  The street was deserted outside of him and the strange, prone girl.  

 

Kylo tried one more time to wake her up. “Hey, kid?  You gotta wake up.  You shouldn’t be out in this kind of weather.”  He shook her shoulder again, again with no response.  He was really starting to worry that there was something wrong with this strange girl.  Her eyelids fluttered, but they stayed resolutely shut.  Kylo looked once more around the empty street before sighing and scooping up the unconscious girl in his arms.  She hardly weighed anything.  He frowned again, looking down at the little mystery in his arms.  She was freezing cold, and Kylo knew that he had to warm her up, and soon.  “Hey.  I’m going to take you to my apartment to warm you up.  I promise you’ll be perfectly safe.  You just can’t stay out here alone, so I will take care of you for a while.”  He started walking back to his apartment.  _Well, it looks like I’m not going into work today._

 

He eventually got into his apartment without setting the girl down once.  Kylo looked around his mostly empty apartment trying to figure out where he could put the girl to get her warm.  He discounted the kitchen almost immediately.  The couch could work, but he didn’t want to soak the leather and ruin it.  That left his bedroom and the bathroom.  He walked to the back of his apartment and settled her on his black bed sheets.  He immediately unwrapped her from her the large piece of cloth that she had buried into.  Her clothes were tattered, barely even rags, as they clung to her scarily thin frame.  She had a dirty white t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and dingy grey pants that came to mid calf on her.  Her arms were wrapped in extra cloth from wrists to shoulders.  Her shoes looked like thrown out Uggs.  Kylo was baffled.  _What happened to this poor girl?_

 

He immediately set to warming her up.  Her lips were starting to turn a scary shade of blue.  Kylo began unwrapping her arms, removing all the unnecessary fabric, but wanting to keep her modesty, just in case she woke up.  He slowly took off her soaked arm wraps, boots and socks.  She still lay quiet and cold.  Kylo went into the bathroom leaving the girl resting on his bed and starting filling up his bathtub with lukewarm water, careful not to make it too hot.  He threw his jacket off, tossing it somewhere in his room.  He went back and picked her up again letting her hand rest against his chest, soaking his shirt, causing him to shiver.  Kylo gently set her down into the water with her clothes on.  _I hope this works.  If nothing else it will warm her up a little before I can get her somewhere dry._ He sat down on the edge of the tub, balancing her in the shallow water, watching for any change in her demeanor.  After a few minutes of soaking, her lips started to change back to a normal pink color.  Kylo sighed in relief.  He backed up a little bit to make sure she wouldn’t fall in the water while he went to get her a change of clothes.  She stayed balanced and he sprinted out not wanting to leave her unattended for long.  He grabbed the first clean T-shirt and sweats he could find and ran back into the bathroom.  She was starting to sag towards the water.  Kylo quickly set her back up.  He brushed her hair out of her face tenderly.  

 

“Alright, kid.  We got to get you out of those soaked clothes or else you’re going to freeze again.  Now, I don’t want to undress you without your permission, but you’re not responding right now, and I have to do my duty in warming you up.”  Kylo looked into the young girls face, hoping for some response.  He didn’t get any.  “Okay.  Here’s how it’s going to work.  I’m going to get you out of this tub and wrap you up in a towel.  Then we’ll take off your pants and put on some of my sweats.  I know we should take off ALL your clothes, but we don’t know each other that well yet.”  Kylo knew he was rambling, but he felt better explaining to the girl what he was going to do before he did it.  “Then after we get you in sweats we are going to take off your shirt and put on one of my dry ones, alright?  Alright, let’s do this kid.”

 

Kylo lifted her out of the bathtub and wrapped her in one of his towels.  He dried as much of the water off her as he could.  Laying her down on the ground, he pulled off her pants and quickly slid his sweats up as high as he dared.  

 

“Alright.  Here’s the tricky part.”  Kylo felt awkward and embarrassed, but quickly unwrapped her and sat her up so she was leaning against his chest.  “Sorry, kid.”  With that, he quickly ripped off her shirt and slipped his t-shirt over her head.  He then gently pulled both her arms through the sleeves.  Her hair was leaving damp spots on his chest and on her shoulders.  He grabbed the towel and started to towel dry her hair noticing for the first time the three strange buns she had put in.  He shrugged and undid the buns to more fully dry her hair.  Drying it as much as he could in his awkward position, he finally set aside the towel, somewhat pleased with his work.  He knew he had to call into his work and let them know that he wouldn’t be able to make it in today.  But first, he had to get his little mystery into bed.

 

***

 

Kylo was in the kitchen cooking some chicken noodle soup when he heard a blood-curdling scream coming from his bedroom.  He dropped the ladle he was using to stir the soup and sprinted into his room to see the girl clutching the bed sheets closer and looking around in confusion and fear.  Seeing him caused her to scream even louder, if that were possible.  Kylo’s head was starting to hurt from the constant noise.  He put his hands in the air where she could see them, and tried to hunch his shoulders, hopefully making himself look less imposing.

 

“Hey, hey, hey, calm down, kid!”  She stopped screaming and stared wide-eyed at him as he took one step further into the room.  She mirrored his movement by scooting higher up the bed, away from him.  He immediately stopped where he was.  “You’re safe here.  You don’t have anything to worry about.  I saw you outside in the rain and you weren’t responding when I tried to wake you up.  You were freezing, so I brought you up here to warm you up.”  

 

She looked down nervously at what she was wearing and then back up at him.  He could almost read the question on her face she didn’t dare ask.  “Your clothes were soaked.  I warmed you up in a bath, with all of your clothes on.  Then after you were a little warmer I tried to dry you off with a towel, but you weren’t going to get any warmer in wet clothes.  So, I changed you into some of my stuff.  I tried to preserve your modesty as best as I could.”  

 

She relaxed a little at that.  Her hands relaxed the death grip she had on the sheets.  She looked up at him and cocked her head to the side, studying him.  Kylo noticed she had beautiful hazel eyes.  He cleared his throat and shuffled his feet under her gaze.  “I’m Kylo, by the way.  I have some chicken noodle soup on the stove.  Would you like me to bring you some?”  Her eyes brightened and she nodded her head excitedly.  He smiled at her from across the room.  “Alright, kid.  You just stay right there, alright?”  He looked at her and saw her nod.  He nodded back before leaving the room to bring her a bowl of warm soup.  He came back with two large bowls, spoons, garlic bread, and two glasses of water on a tray.  Her entire face lit up at the sight.  Kylo felt himself respond to her joy by allowing himself a small smile.  The reprimand from his boss was worth it for this.  He walked across the room with his offering and set the tray on the nightstand next to his bed and then carefully set a bowl of soup on her lap.

 

“Careful, kid, it’s hot.”  She nodded in agreement and he handed her a spoon.  She immediately started to scarf down the soup sloppily.

 

“Take it easy!  It’s not going to disappear on you.  And there is a whole pot of it out in the kitchen, so you can always have more.”

 

Her arm slowly fell as she stared up at him with wide, wonder-filled eyes.  Kylo couldn’t understand what she was trying to communicate to him.  His brow furrowed as her head cocked to the side again, just staring at him.  Her hungry eyes eventually drifted past him, settling on the garlic bread as she started to eat her soup again in large, but slower bites.  Kylo saw where her gaze was fixed and let out a small huff of amusement before picking up the garlic bread and handing it to her.  She accepted his offer timidly, smiling shyly up at him.  He felt his heart constrict at the sight as she continued to devour her food.  In a matter of minutes she had finished everything in front of her.  She watched him carefully as he started to clean up her used dishes.  _What has she gone through that has made her so wary of people?_ He took his own half eaten bowl but left the plate with the garlic bread behind on his nightstand, sure it would all be gone by the time he got back.

 

He wandered back to his bedroom, deathly curious of the girl occupying his bed.  She was laying back, content for the moment.  Kylo stopped at the door to take in the strange scene of this girl occupying a space usually only occupied by himself.  He enjoyed having her in his space, even if he hadn’t known her for long.  He could feel the desire to keep her safe grow inside of him.  He couldn’t explain why, but it felt _right_ to have her here, being taken care of by him.

 

She sat up straight when she realized he was watching from the doorway.  Kylo walked to the opposite edge of the bed and sat down and faced her.  She was leaning away from him.  _Wary, always wary._

 

“What’s your name, kid?”

 

He wanted to know everything about her.

 

She cleared her throat.  Her voice was thin and scratchy from disuse.  “Rey.”  Her British accent hit Kylo like a ton of bricks.  _What is a British girl doing here of all places?_

 

“Hi, Rey.  That’s a beautiful name.”  He smiled at her gently, trying to comfort her.

 

She blushed gently, causing butterflies to fill Kylo’s stomach.

 

“Where are you from?”

 

Rey looked down at the comforter before answering quietly, “Arizona.”

 

Kylo blinked in surprise.  He was expecting somewhere foreign with her accent. 

 

“How did you end up here, Rey?”

 

Her face went pale, and her eyes went wide.  She stared past him mournfully, lost in her own thoughts.  Kylo leaned towards her, very concerned.  She had lost all of the color she had gained that day.

 

“Rey?”

 

Her eyes quickly snapped to his.  He tilted his head to the side and she quickly mimicked him.  “Are you hiding from something?”

 

Her eyes widened and she looked desperately around the room for some kind of escape.  Kylo quickly, almost desperately, said, “It’s okay if you are!  I know what it’s like to try and get away from something.”  Rey had stopped looking around desperately, and fixed her eyes once again on Kylo.  “I just want to know, so I can help you.”  He smiled at her confused expression.

 

Rey shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts.  Kylo sat in anxious, but patient, agony for her to say something, anything.

 

Rey eventually nodded.  “Yes, I am running from something.”  It was a mumbled, barely there, but Kylo caught it.  “But I’m not going to tell you what it is!”  She turned her determined eyes onto his face, setting her jaw and crossing her arms.

 

Kylo smiled at her.  “Alright, just let me take care of you for now.”

 

Rey’s determined jaw dropped open at his words.  “Just like that?  For…nothing?”

 

Kylo frowned.  He did not like what that sentence said about where she had come from.  _She doesn’t have to worry now.  I’ll take good care of my little Rey._ The thought made him pause.  When had he started thinking of her as his?  He shrugged.  Right now there were more important things to worry about.  “You don’t owe me anything, kid.  You’re in trouble and I am more than willing to help you out.”  Kylo saw her mouth open as she tried to protest.  “And I don’t want to hear any talk about you trying to pay me back.  And I mean it!”

 

Rey was speechless for a second.  She slowly smiled up at his unintentionally hulking frame.  “Thank you, Kylo.”

 

Kylo beamed at the small girl wrapped in his blankets.  “No worries, kid.  We’ll just get you all better, alright?”

 

Rey smiled and snuggled back into his bed.  Right where she belonged.

 


	2. Tender Loving Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey had a melt down and Kylo tries to help out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not completely sure where I want to go with this, but if there is anything you guys want me to incorporate, let me know!! I would love some inspiration :)

Rey had slept most of the day.  Kylo had gone in there every hour or so to make sure she was still there and alive.  It was getting late at night and Kylo knew he should feed her sometime soon.  He didn’t want to wake her, but she needed to eat.  She was way too skinny in his opinion.  Unhealthy was what came to mind.  He started to prepare some chicken casserole to put in the oven.  He wanted to get as much protein and vegetables into her as her could.  He preheated the oven to the desired temperature, and started cutting the chicken and placing it in a glass pan with broccoli and cream of chicken.  He was quietly engrossed in his work, cutting and seasoning everything to perfection.  The pattering of small feet on the wood caught his attention.  He turned and saw Rey standing, swamped in his clothes.  He could barely see her tiny toes peeking out from under his rolled up sweats.  Her slim shoulder was threatening to peek out from the collar of his shirt.  Rey shifted uneasily at the other side of the kitchen.  Kylo smiled at her, trying to comfort her, but stayed across the room.  He turned back to preparing their dinner.

 

“What are you doing out of bed, kid?”

 

He could hear her clothes shifting.  “Um… I’m not tired anymore, and I didn’t know where you were, so I guess I came to see where you were?”   Her voice was groggy from sleep.  Her eyes half closed from waking from her long nap.

 

Kylo smiled down at the food where Rey couldn’t see it.  “You don’t have to stand there, you know.  Have a seat.  You can sit on the couch in the living room or, if you want to keep an eye on things over here, you can sit at the island.”

 

He heard the dull slaps of her feet move towards the barstools by the island.  He looked up as she sat down, and tried to give her a friendly smile.  She gave a nervous grimace back before directing her attention to the food he had prepared.

 

“You ever had chicken broccoli casserole, kid?”  

 

Rey quickly shook her head no, her hair flying in all directions.  Kylo couldn’t help but think she was adorable with sleep lines across her cheeks, dried drool on one side of her mouth, and terrible bed head.

 

“Then you are in for a treat.  This is my favorite meal, especially on a cold, rainy day like today.”  Rey looked up at him, round eyes fixed on his.  “My mother used to make this for me when I wasn’t feeling very good, so I decided to keep the tradition alive.”  He smiled sadly at her.

 

Rey cocked her head to the side, brow furrowing in concentration.  “What happened to your mom, Kylo?”

 

Kylo tensed.  He didn’t want to get into this right now… but if that was the only way to get Rey to open up about her past… 

 

“My mom died when I was in high school.”  He busied himself with putting tin foil over the casserole and sticking it in the oven.

 

“How old were you?”

 

Kylo sighed and ran a hand through his hair, tugging on the ends.  “Sixteen.”  He let his hand fall and slap the side of his thigh.  He kept his gaze far away from Rey’s piercing eyes.  

 

“I’m sorry, Kylo.”

 

Kylo shrugged his shoulders.  “There’s nothing that can change that now.”  He desperately wanted to change the subject back to her.  “Why were you outside in the rain?”

 

Rey’s face immediately shut down.  He could almost see her walls slam back down.  Her expressive hazel eyes went emotionless.  

 

Kylo knew he messed up terribly.  He immediately wanted to take back the last ten minutes of his life and start over.  But he couldn’t.  He had to fix this, and fix it now.

 

“I’m sorry, Rey!  Please forget I asked!  I shouldn’t ask those kinds of questions.”  His eyes were desperate, pleading with her to understand.

 

“It’s okay.”  Her answer was very monotone, her eyes glazed over, staring at nothing.

 

“Kid, please look at me.”  Rey’s eyes slowly focused back on him, though they still were kept curiously blank.  “Rey…”

 

Her eyes were filling with tears.  Her shining eyes reflected all of the light surrounding her.  His dark eyes absorbed all the light hers reflected.  Kylo was unsure of how to console her.  He knew so little about comforting others.  Her galaxy-filled eyes dropped to the counter where he could see the tears gathering on her long lashes.  The moisture gathered as he watched this impossibly fragile girl try to control her emotions in front of him.  He should do something.  Offer her some sort of comfort.  Hug her.  Feed her.  Care for her.  Something!  Kylo was frozen to the spot as one lone tear slid from her lashes down her curved cheek.  He watched, mesmerized, as the tear left a long track from her eye to the corner of her pink lips.  Rey sniffed, trying to contain the snot that was working its way out of her nose.  The loud sound jarred Kylo into action.  He went into the bathroom and returned with a box of tissues.  He placed those next to Rey on the island and went to the cupboard to fill a glass of water for her.  He set this down by the box of tissues, before cautiously sitting in the chair next to the small, broken girl.  He didn’t say anything, he just reached out with one finger, clearing the track her one escaped tear had made.  At the contact, Rey started, and turned towards Kylo.  He met her wet eyes and silently tried to convey that everything would be okay.  Rey stared into his face for a few moments before dropping her head into his chest and letting out a pathetic whimper.  Kylo was startled by the change, but quickly recovered, wrapping his long arms around her slim body and pulling her even closer so she was basically sitting across his lap.  He had a momentary flashback from this morning of carrying her into his house, but quickly turned his attention to the girl falling apart in his arms.  She burrowed her head into his shirt, shoulders shaking from silent sobs.  He rubbed soothing circles on her back, gently rocking her back and forth, trying to calm her down.  Her hands tightened in his shirt, trying to pull herself closer.  Kylo tightened his arms around her pulling her flush against his chest, letting her cry for as long as she needed.  He soothed her hair down, cradling her head to his chest, close to his heart.  She slowly calmed down, coming to rest gently in his arms.  Kylo kept her cradled close for a few moments more before trying to loosen his grip around her.  She immediately tensed back up and gripped his snot-covered shirt.  He retightened his hold on her once again.

 

“Shh.  I got you, kid.  You don’t have to worry about anything.  I got you.”  He whispered these soothing phrases in her hair and placed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.  Rey relaxed into him once again.  He held her as their dinner cooked, lightly whispering soothing words to her, allowing her all the physical contact she may need.  The timer eventually went off.  Kylo sighed.  “Rey…”  She didn’t respond, just held onto him tighter.  “Rey, kid, you don’t want our food to burn do you?”  Her stomach growled in response, causing him to laugh gently.  She clearly didn’t have any intention of letting him go anytime soon.  Kylo smiled fondly at the top of her head, squeezing her once.  “I’m not going anywhere, alright?  I’m going to take the food out of the oven and come right back here, okay?”  Rey gave him a tiny nod.  Kylo nodded back and shifted his arms to more easily set her on her own chair.  She sunk into the seat, almost boneless.  She kept her eyes fixed on a single spot on the island.  Kylo rushed to the oven and took out the casserole and set it on the island with plates and forks.  He scurried to Rey’s side and sat down in his seat.  She didn’t react to any of Kylo’s shifting movements.  He hesitantly reached out and gently placed his hand on her shoulder.  She turned towards him without looking at his face and climbed back into his lap, resting her head on his collarbone.  He held her silently, swaying gently from side to side, resting his chin on the crown of her head, enjoying the comfort of having her in his arms.  This scrap of a girl he had found half drowned outside his apartment.  Had it really only been this morning?  He felt as though he had always had her in his life.  He gently pulled back from her to reach for a plate and a fork.  He kept one hand on her back to keep her against his chest, and the other to load the plate up with the steaming casserole.  The scent gently wafted over him, causing his mouth to water.  He could almost see his mom looking at him with her gentle eyes as she stood over him, taking care of him.  He pulled the plate closer to them and speared one of the broccoli pieces.  He gently blew on it before shifting so he could see Rey’s face.

 

“Alright, kid.  You ready to eat?”  He smiled as she perked up at his statement.  She turned her face away from his shirt and cautiously took the fork out of his hand to eat.  Her mouth was full and her eyes were wide with wonder as she looked up at him.  He smiled down at her as she started to scarf down the food.  There was only one piece of broccoli left when she turned to him with it speared on her fork.  Rey nervously avoided his gaze as she offered her last bite of food to him.  He graciously took her fork out of his hands and ate it, letting out a contented sigh when he swallowed.  Rey giggled quietly and Kylo beamed at her.  She was quick to burrow herself back in the safety of his shirt.  He filled the plate back up with food and grabbed the other fork.  He gave Rey back hers and they shared the plate of food, Rey taking most of it before Kylo could get to it.  After the plate was clean Rey leaned back into his chest and let out a contented sigh.

 

“That was the best thing I have ever eaten.”  Kylo beamed at her statement.  She turned her head to look into his deep eyes.  “Thank you, Kylo.”  Her cheeks turned pink as she looked down at her hands.  Kylo knew she wasn’t just referring to the meal.

 

“Anytime, kid.”

 

Rey smiled and leaned back into him.  They sat there in companionable silence for awhile, enjoying each other’s company.  Rey’s eyes were drooping.  _She’s had a long day.  Probably a long couple of days._ Kylo thought, looking down at her relaxed features.  Her hair was all over him, tickling his nose and some trying to get into his mouth.  _I should get her into bed._ He gently jostled her, waking her from her small doze.

 

“We should get you into bed, kid.  You’re exhausted.”  Rey nodded, but made no move to get up.  Her eyes were determined as she looked up at him, daring him with her eyes.  He rolled his eyes at her stubbornness.  He shifted his arms so one was under her knees and the other supporting her back.  He stood and took her back to his bed.  He set her on the edge, only to have her grip his shoulders urgently.  Her eyes were wide with panic.  “What’s wrong, Rey?”

 

She swallowed hard and Kylo’s eyes followed the movement of her throat before flicking back up to her intense gaze.  “You won’t leave me, will you?”  Her voice was breathless, fearful.

 

“Never.”  He spoke it as a prayer, an oath.  “I’m going to get a washcloth to wash your face, and then I will change into some pajamas, alright?”

 

She nodded and watched intently as he moved to the bathroom.  He kept the door open so she could see what he was doing.  He brought the wet wash cloth and gently scrubbed her face clean.  He frowned down at her.  “Do you want to brush your teeth?”  He blushed.  “Or… do whatever else you have to?”  He looked down at his clasped hands.

 

Rey giggled as she realized what he meant.  “That sounds nice.  But I don’t have a toothbrush here.”  She shrugged her shoulders.

 

Kylo smiled as his heart swelled with affection for this little mystery.  “I have an extra.  Feel free to use it.  I’ll give you a few minutes of privacy.”  He ducked his head and went to find a change of clothes for the night.  Rey was out as soon as he had changed and Kylo went in for a few minutes of his own privacy.  He walked out to see Rey nestled in his bedcovers.  He smiled sweetly at her, and her answering smile was shy.  He grabbed one of the pillows and started to walk out.  He felt a small hand grab the back of his shirt, halting his movements.

 

“Where are you going?”  Rey demanded.

 

Kylo turned around to see her face scrunched up in confusion and determination.  “I was going to sleep on the couch, so you wouldn’t feel uncomfortable.”

 

Her eyes widened in understanding.  She let go of his shirt and he started moving towards the door again.

 

“Wait!”  Kylo turned around again to see her small hand extended towards him.  “Please don’t go!”  She looked wildly around the room.  Her eyes fell to her lap where she was wringing the sheets together.  “Stay here with me.”  Her voice was barely above a whisper.

 

Kylo let out a small, shocked noise.  He had no idea how to react to this small hurricane, besides giving in to what she wanted.  Throwing caution to the wind, Kylo crawled into bed next to her.  He settled down and heard Rey’s sigh of relief.  She settled in as Kylo turned off the lights.  He had no idea what he was doing, but being with Rey felt _right,_ somehow.  He lay with his back to her and fell gently to sleep.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like it! *nervously rings hands*


	3. Let Me Take Care of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First full day together! And both are conscious!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have LOVED your guy's ideas!! They have really helped!! (I may have used a few of them to help me finish this chapter... ;))

He woke to small breaths against the back of his neck.   He turned his head to see Rey snuggled against his back.  Kylo let out a soft sigh of content.  _Thank goodness it’s Saturday!_   He didn’t have work today, so he could stay in bed as long as he liked.  She must have sensed him stir because she snuggled even closer to him.  Kylo let her soft breaths pull him back to sleep.

 

***

 

When Kylo woke up again the sun was streaming in from the windows.  He turned on his back, stretching his arms above his head, working the kinks out of his back.  He looked to see where Rey was.  Only she wasn’t there anymore.  He shot up fast enough to cause his world to spin from the head rush.  He shook his head and began looking around the room, hoping to see her.  She was nowhere to be found.

 

“Rey?”

 

No answer.

 

“Rey?”  His panic was climbing a little higher.

 

Still no answer.

 

“Rey!”  He was getting frantic now.  _What if she left me?  What if she’s back on the streets?  She’s not ready to leave yet!_ Kylo tore through the bedroom door into the living room.  He looked across the room and saw Rey in the kitchen.  Kylo sagged in relief.  _She hasn’t left me_ _._   She was staring wide-eyed at his sudden entrance.  Her hair was all over the place, her borrowed clothes rumpled, and she had… _is that flour?_ Kylo slowly walked over to where she was standing behind the kitchen island.  Flour covered most of the island, bowls half filled with various ingredients were scattered around the kitchen.  Spoons were on almost every available surface.  It looked like she had taken half of his kitchen and dumped it on his island.  His mouth fell open as he took in her flour covered shirt and face.  She was watching his expression anxiously as he took in the disaster she had caused.  Seeing him looking at her she finally broke the silence.

 

“I promise I was going to clean once I was finished!  You just woke up a lot earlier than I was expecting.  I won’t do it again.”  He head was bowed and Kylo stared at her curiously.  _Where in the world had she come from?_

 

“Rey, look at me.”  Her chin raised, but she kept her eyes away from his.  He huffed in frustration.  “What were you trying to do?”

 

Her eyes flicked up to him, before dropping to the floor again.  “Make biscuits…” It was soft, submissive.

 

“Those sound amazing!”  

 

Rey looked up at his optimistic voice.  Her eyes reflected her confusion to him.  “Do you… You mean you aren’t mad?”  She wringed her hands nervously, watching him closely.

 

Kylo was shocked.  _I really hope this doesn’t mean what I think it does…_ “Of course not, kid!  You can use anything you want in this apartment.”  He placed his hands on her shoulders.  She looked up at him in wonder.  He looked down at her with the sincerest look he could muster.  Her tense shoulders relaxed under his hands as she looked up at his earnest eyes.  She slowly raised her arms to wrap around his waist.  She settled her head on his chest, similar to the night before.  Kylo quickly shifted his arms to encase her, but he let her set the pace at a light embrace.  He thought he heard a small ‘ _thank you_ ’ whispered in his shirt, but he wasn’t certain.  She pulled away and Kylo let her go.  Rey had a cute blush high on her cheekbones.  Kylo breathed deeply and turned towards the mess.

 

“How far did you get?”

 

“Um, well, I couldn’t find everything, so I’m just starting, I guess.”

 

Kylo turned to look fondly back at her.  “So, you just got out every bowl and spoon you could find?”

 

Rey’s eyes snapped back up to scowl at him.  “It was an accident, okay?”

 

Kylo laughed at her defiance, enjoying every movement as she stalked back to her collection of bowls and spoons.  “So what happened?”  Kylo followed her, standing on the other side of his island, looking down at the messy girl.

 

Rey turned bright red and stared intently on cleaning up the bowls.  “Well, uh… I was getting out bowls, but I couldn’t find the one that was the right size, so I just grabbed all of them.  For comparison!”  She grimaced sheepishly at her hands.  “Then I was trying to find where you kept the silverware.  I found the drawer, so I kept it open so I could use it later and not forget.  When I went to get out the flour it kinda…fell…out of my hands…right into the drawer with all your silverware…”

 

Kylo howled with laughter.  He squeezed his eyes shut and let out the mirth that settled deep in his chest.  By the time he finished he had tears running down his face and his sides were sore.  Seeing Rey’s defiant face set him off again.  He took several minutes to fully compose himself.  Rey was standing awkwardly, shifting from foot to foot.  Kylo wanted nothing more than to pull her back in his arms, but he was determined to do everything at her pace.  She wrinkled her nose at him as he laughed at her, before turning and focusing on scavenging his cupboards.  Kylo quickly wiped the tears off of his face and went to stand besides her.

 

“Need any help?”

 

She turned and gave him a half-hearted glare.  “No.”

 

“Ah, come on, Rey!  I want to help you.”  He gave Rey the biggest puppy dog eyes he could give, even pouting his lower lip for maximum effect.

 

Rey studied him, frowning at his ridiculous face before motioning him over to help her.  They worked silently side by side, effortlessly.  She would hold her hand out and Kylo would know what she wanted.  They quickly got the biscuits into the oven and settled on Kylo’s couch.  Rey was sitting close enough that he could easily reach her if he wanted.  Kylo looked over at Rey as she snuggled down in his clothes.  He frowned.  As much as he liked seeing her in his clothes, would have to do something about her wardrobe.  She didn’t exactly have luggage with her when he found her.  She was staring back at him, monitoring his expressions.

 

“What are you thinking about?”  Her small voice came, throwing him out of his thoughts.

 

He smiled down at her worried face.  “I was just thinking that we would have to get you some clothes that are actually your size.”  She looked down at the black t-shirt she was currently wearing.

 

“Why?”

 

Kylo was a little startled at her question.  “Well, because as much as I like seeing you swim in my clothes, it would be a little more practical for you to have something that fits you, right?”

 

Rey shrugged.  “I guess.”

 

“How about after we have breakfast we get cleaned up and go get some clothes for you?”  Kylo studied her reaction to his words.  She was startled and looked up at him, judging his words.  She nodded and looked down at her hands.  Kylo let a small smile cross his face.

 

Soon the biscuits are done.  Kylo and Rey sit at the island.  Rey moves her seat close enough to Kylo’s that their shoulders brush.  They finish in silence and work together to clean the rest of the dishes that are out.  They walk together to his bedroom.  Kylo goes to the closet and pulls out a change of clothes for him.  He turns uncertainly to Rey.

 

“Do you want to shower before we go?”  Rey shrugged.  “Um,” he cleared his throat, forcing out his next question, “what would you like to wear?”

 

Rey looked up at him in confusion and then down to the clothes she was currently wearing.  “Um, this?”

 

Kylo smiled at her answer.  “You can’t wear that.  It’s covered in flour!”  Plus, she wasn’t the cleanest eater.  “Here.  I have something you can wear.”  Kylo went back into his closet grabbed his shortest sweats and smallest sweatshirt.  “You can wear your other clothes, if you want to.  I’m sure they’re dry by now, but you’ll want to have a jacket.”  Kylo smiled at her as he handed her the bundle of clothes he had collected.

 

Rey smiled timidly back up at him.  “Okay.”  She turned and went into the bathroom, leaving Kylo to get ready in the bedroom.  

 

He was ready to go in under five minutes.  He had changed into some black jeans, a t-shirt, and his combat boots.  He didn’t have any mirrors in the bedroom, so he just hand his hand through his hair a couple of times and hoped for the best.  Rey came out a minute or so after he was done.  Her hair was loose and hung to her shoulders.  She had thrown on her old pants and boots, but had added Kylo’s sweatshirt.  It came to mid thigh on her smaller frame, the sleeves hanging way below her fingertips.  Kylo smiled at the sight of her.  She smiled shyly back at him.

 

“You know, we can roll up the sleeves, so that way we could see your little hands.”  Rey just nodded and came to stand right in front of him, holding out one of her arms.  Kylo grinned.  Her gently rolled the extra sleeve up to her wrist.  Rey held up her other hand, and he repeated the action on the other side.  “You ready to go now?”  Rey nodded and followed Kylo as he grabbed his wallet, keys, and jacket and then walked out of his apartment.  He led her to his car, and opened the passenger side door for her to climb into.  She smiled shyly at the ground at his chivalry and quickly buckled up.  Kylo pulled out of the lot and started driving them to their destination.  They sat in comfortable silence.  The drive was over soon after it had started.  Kylo pulled them to a small shopping outlet.  There were several stores that they could visit.  Kylo stepped out of the car and went to open Rey’s door.  She ducked under his arm and stood on the sidewalk.  She looked uncomfortable as she took in the sights all around her.  Kylo smiled at her.  She flitted a smile back at him.

 

“Where do you want to go?”

 

Rey looked at him uncertainly.  “I don’t know…”  She pause and then added, “I’ve never been shopping for myself before…”

 

Kylo looked at her in surprise.  He wanted to know every story behind her cryptic statements.  He shook his head, trying to contain his curiosity.  “Alright, kid.  How about we try to find some clothes you like?”

 

She looked up eagerly and nodded.  Kylo started to lead them towards the nearest store.  There was a small gathering of people in front of the door, blocking their entrance.  Kylo started to push through the crowd, easily parting with his large body.  He checked behind him to make sure Rey was following.  She was a little behind, getting jostled by some of the people trying to move through her.  She reached out a small hand and gripped the back of his coat like a vice.  Kylo smiled at her and dragged her through the crowd with his larger stride.  They made it into the brightly lit shop relatively unscathed.  Rey let go of her death grip and spun to take in the entire store, her face full of wonder.  Kylo watched her with a small smile of his own.  He felt like this was going to be a good day.

 

***

 

It had been a long day.  Rey had fallen asleep on the ride home in the passenger side of his car.  The back seat had several shopping bags full of stuff for Rey.  Kylo smiled at the girl snuggled in the seat beside him.  He gently parked his car.  Rey was lightly snoring, deeply asleep.  Kylo unbuckled and walked around the car to pull open Rey’s door.  She didn’t stir.  He reached across her and unbuckled her seatbelt.  He eased his arms under her knees and around her back, gently cradling her in his arms.  She stirred a tiny bit at the movement of getting her out of the car, her arms coming to grip his shirtfront and her head nuzzling his chest.  Kylo decided he quite liked having her in his arms.  He got her back upstairs into his apartment with her sleeping in his arms.  He laid her under the covers in his bed and tucked her in gently.  Spontaneously, he kissed her forehead, whispering, “I’ll be back soon.”  He tore his gaze away from the serene girl and walked back down to his car to gather their purchases.  Rey had gotten everything from frilly shirts to plaid button downs.  He had found he couldn’t tell her no to anything.  Kylo had made sure she had gotten some shoes that she could wear at any occasion: boots, flats, and even some small heels.  He enjoyed spoiling her.  He couldn’t really explain the pull her felt towards this girl who had fallen into his care, but he wasn’t complaining either.  He made it in the apartment.  He put away the groceries in the kitchen.  He went into the bedroom to see Rey still asleep.  He smiled, warmth building in his chest.  He put her new clothes away in his closet, clearing some of his clothes out to make room for her.  He felt the undeniable pleasure in seeing her clothes mixed in with his.  He stripped down, out of his day clothes and threw on some pajamas.  He walked out and gently shook Rey awake.

 

“Kylo?...”  Her sleepy voice caused Kylo to smile down at her confused expression.

 

“You should change into some pjs, then you can go back to sleep.”

 

She nodded sleepily and staggered her way into the bathroom.  She emerged a few minutes later and crashed back onto the pillows of her side of the bed.  Kylo was pleased to notice she had slipped back into his sweats and t-shirt.  She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.  Kylo smiled and tucked her in, kissing her forehead.  He quickly turned off the lights, settling himself down to sleep.  Tomorrow would be a good time to have some questions answered.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise more history on the both of them next chapter!!
> 
> I'm not 100% pleased with how it turned out, but *shrug* whatever, it's done!
> 
> As always, your ideas and comments give me life! Please keep them coming!
> 
> I have a tumblr!! Come talk if you want! I posted a moodboard if you guys wanted to see it!
> 
> Link: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/roamingaustenites


	4. The Past Can Hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Rey have a heart-to-heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so sorry this took so long!!! I had finals and everything went to crap! Here's this shortish chapter! I hope you guys like it!!

A loud scream woke Kylo from his sleep. He shot up and looked around for the source and saw Rey thrashing and screaming in her sleep. He desperately shock one of her shoulders, trying to wake her up.

  
“Rey! Rey, please wake up!” His voice was thick with sleep and desperation. His hands were shaking from the panic of being woken up so abruptly.

  
Rey continued to thrash against Kylo’s hold, refusing to wake up. Her screams turned into words that sounded like “no” and “please” and “come back”. Kylo took to shaking both of her shoulders ready to try anything to wake her from her nightmare.

“Rey! I’m right here! Please wake up!” Kylo’s voice was too panicked to be soothing, but he just wanted to see her eyes, offer her comfort in any way he could.

  
Rey’s eyes snapped open. She pulled away from him and struggled to get as far away from him as possible. Kylo let her scramble away, trying not to let the sting of her rejection dissuade him from helping her. Her eyes were wildly taking in the room with her arms wrapped around her knees and her wild rocking to calm herself. Her wide eyes overflowed with tears that coursed down her cheeks. Kylo reached out a hand in the space between them. Rey snapped her eyes over to his hand and followed the line of his arm up to his face. When she met his eyes, she began to sob in earnest. She quickly ducked her head into the cradle of her arms and knees.

  
“Rey…” Kylo gently placed his hand on the top of her head. She flinched away from him, and drew closer into herself. “Rey, please let me help you…” Rey tear streaked face slowly lifted up to him, piercing right into his heart. He shifted over to her side of the bed and offered both his arms to her. Rey crashed into his opened arms, allowing Kylo to comfort her. His heart broke for this girl who must have had something terrible happen to her. He wished he could take away all her pain, but right now all he could do was offer the comfort his embrace may be able to give to her. Rey’s hands gripped the front of his shirt, similar to the first night she was in his life. Kylo rocked the sobbing girl, stroking her hair. He spoke words of comfort into her hair, saying, “It’s okay, Rey. It was only a dream. I’m here. I won’t leave you.” The words only seemed to make Rey sob harder, so Kylo stopped and contented himself to rocking her and holding her as close as he could. Her sobbing eventually quieted. Kylo pulled back a little to look down at her face. She was staring determinately at his chest, refusing to meet his eyes.

  
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kylo mumbled.

  
Rey shook her head, still not looking up at him.

  
Kylo frowned. “Are you going to be okay?”

  
Again, Rey shook her head.

  
Kylo sighed and nodded. “Okay. What can I do?”

  
“Hold me.” It was so quiet he wasn’t even sure she had said it, but she quickly peeked up at him and he nodded again, holding her closer to his chest. He rested his back against the pillows and pulled Rey with him. They both settled in with Kylo continuing to play with Rey’s hair. Her breathing deepened and she was soon sound asleep. Kylo could feel his eyes grow heavier. He willed himself not to fall asleep, to take care of Rey, but the welcoming arms of sleep eventually pulled him down.

  
***

  
Kylo woke up to the sun shining on his face and a warmth laying across his chest. He peeked open his eyes to see Rey spread eagle on top of him. He huffed out a soft mix between a laugh and a sigh. He glanced over to the clock to see it was still early. Rey’s breathing tickled his neck where her head was currently nestled. Her hair tickled his nose and he tried to gently blow the wayward strands away before quickly giving up and leaning his head back against his pillows. He couldn’t understand her, yet this felt like home. Like he belonged. He hadn’t felt that way since, well, ever. His little mystery showed up and made a home for herself in his lonely life, and he didn’t want it any other way. Kylo gently extracted his arm from underneath Rey to gently tuck her hair behind her ear and to soothe the rest into something tamer than the bedhead it was. She stirred a little, snuggling closer to him. Kylo wanted to talk to her about her nightmare but he refused to wake her up. He looked down at her face snuggled against his chest and smiled. Her lips were parted, eyes scrunched closed. Her hair reached out and tried to tangle itself in Kylo’s hand. Her arms were tucked close to her body, hands lying on his chest, gripping his shirt. He could lay here forever. In fact, he had no intention of moving any time soon. Rey had other plans. She started to stir, slowly becoming conscious to the outside world. Her eyes blinked blurrily around the room in confusion. They finally landed on him before focusing.

  
“Hey, kid.”

  
Rey gave him a tired half-smile before noticing the position they were in. She scrambled off him, throwing her hands in the air. “I’m sorry!”

  
“It’s alright. You had a nightmare last night.” Rey went pale. “Do you… do you want to talk about it?” Rey looked up at Kylo with her pleading hazel eyes. “How about we get ready and eat breakfast and then we can talk?” Kylo smiled softly. Rey nodded and went to the bathroom, presumably to get ready for the day.

  
Kylo got out of bed and made his way to his closet. He grabbed some jeans and a black t-shirt and changed out of his pajamas and into them. He heard the shower running as he passed by the bathroom. He shrugged and made his way to start breakfast for the two of them, before he could fully prepare for the day, giving Rey time to enjoy her shower. Kylo walked to his refrigerator, wondering what Rey would like to eat. He mentally debated eggs and toast and pancakes. I have some fruit that would go nicely with pancakes… He shrugged and prepared the batter for pancakes. He was just putting the first ones on the stove when Rey walked into the kitchen. Kylo heard her bare feet cross the wood before he saw her.

  
“How do pancakes sound for breakfast?” He turned around and immediately choked back his laughter. Rey was standing wearing jeans and a similar black t-shirt to his own ensemble. Rey was staring at him. “Hey! We’re twinners!” Kylo grinned stupidly at Rey, eyes crinkling.

  
Rey looked down at what she was wearing and then back up at what Kylo was wearing. She offered him a weak smile and a shrug.

  
Kylo frowned at her reaction, worried he had done something wrong. “Do you like pancakes?”

  
“I don’t know. I’ve never had them.”

  
Kylo almost dropped the spatula he was holding. His mouth gaped open and he had to physically will himself to close his mouth again. Rey was staring at the floor, shuffling her feet and avoiding eye contact. “Well, then I’ll make sure to make you the best pancakes you’ve ever tried.” Rey genuinely smiled at him. _I really need to find out more about this girl._

  
Kylo stacked her plate high with pancakes, syrup spilling off the edges with strawberries and butter melting on the top. He slid the full plate to the other side of the island where Rey was sitting. She smiled at him over the stack of pancakes and gave him a shy smile. She cut a big bite out of her stack of pancakes and shoved her forkful into her mouth. Her cheeks looked comically like a chipmunk and Kylo couldn’t stop himself from laughing at her cute face. Rey looked up at him, confused and tried to say something around the food in her mouth. The resounding gurgle made Kylo laugh even harder. _She is too precious for whatever hurt her…_ Kylo quickly snapped out of his laughter at this thought.

  
Rey swallowed her bite and glared at him. “What?”

  
Kylo smiled at her again.

“Nothing, kid. Do you like your pancakes?”

  
Rey nodded and went back to devouring her stack. Kylo smiled at her enthusiasm and lack of manners. “I’m just going to go get ready for the rest of the day, alright? I’ll be back soon.”

  
Rey gave him an acknowledging grunt, not turning her attention away from the food in front of her.  
Kylo smiled at her and left the kitchen to brush his teeth and fix his hair. He sensed that Rey needed to be alone for a while, and Kylo was more than happy to let that happen. He wanted answers, but he wasn’t going to push her into something she didn’t want to do. Kylo walked out ready for the day. He saw Rey had finished her plate of pancakes and was taking in the rest of the room. Kylo looked around as well and noticed he had little in the way of personal decorations. Kylo stopped short of Rey’s chair, letting her eyes travel the room before resting on him. He smiled fondly at her. She offered him a small smile and tore her eyes away to rest on her empty plate. It looked like she had licked it clean as well. Kylo suppressed a sigh.

  
“Rey. Do you want to talk about last night?”

  
Rey straightened up immediately and pinned him with her panic-filled eyes.

  
“It’s okay if you don’t want to. Just if you want. Alright?”

  
Rey relaxed slightly and nodded. Kylo led her to his couch and sat down, patiently waiting for her to get comfortable. To his surprise she settled down next to him, leaving only an inch of space between the two. Kylo shifted so he faces towards Rey, while she kept her attention straight ahead.

  
She sighed before starting to talk. “It’s a nightmare I’ve always had. Sometimes I don’t have it for months and then I’ll have it for a week straight.” She glanced at his expression. He nodded for her to go on. “It’s about my parents abandoning me. I shout for them not to leave, to come back, but they can’t hear me. I try to run to them, but someone is holding me back. I try to get away from them, but they just grip me harder and start yelling at me. Nasty, vile things that I won’t subject you to.” Rey’s head falls forwards. Kylo’s hand itches to pull her into his arms, but he stops himself before he can act on it. “The dream gets worse from there. It gets cold and rainy, then I am chased by demons. Everyone is yelling at me. I’m lost. Confused. I don’t know where I am, and then everything stops. I am stuck and there is a huge shadow creeping closer to me. It inches its way to me.” Rey sucks in an uneven breath. “I try to move away from it, but it keeps coming closer and closer.” Rey closed her eyes, shaking herself. She looked up at him, right into his soul. “It never gets to me though. As soon as it gets close enough that I can start to see its face, I wake up. I don’t know who it is, but it has haunted me for longer than I can remember.” Rey choked back sobs from the back of her throat.

  
Kylo’s heartstrings ached in sympathy. “Oh, Rey… Is there anything I can do for you?”

  
Rey kept her head in her hands and shook her head. Kylo felt useless. She wasn’t looking at him, so he couldn’t judge her mood. _Would she be okay if I put my arm around her? Do I dare?_ He looked down at her hunched over form. _Hmm… I wonder…_

  
“You know, I sometimes get nightmares still.”

  
Rey perked up at his admission.

  
“Yup. I used to have them all the time when I was sixteen. When my mom died.” Kylo continued. “She died from cancer. She was diagnosed when I was a freshman. I was fourteen.” Kylo cleared his constricting throat. “My parents didn’t want me to worry, thinking that my mom would survive and I would have never known there was a reason to worry in the first place. I didn't know. They kept it from me. I had a huge fight with them one day and I ran out of the house, being a typical teenager.” Kylo closed his eyes. “My dad kept calling me and I ignored it. He probably called me 50 times. I didn't answer until my Uncle Chewie called. My mom had been hospitalized soon after I left. Chewie came and got me and drove me to the hospital, speeding the entire way there. But when I got there, it was too late. My mom was already gone. That's when my dad told me about her disease. I have never felt that much hatred in my life. They kept my mom’s sickness away from me and the last thing she heard from me was a stupid fight. I had Chewie drive me home and I packed some clothes and money and left. I haven't been back since.”

Rey’s eyes were wide and full of tears. “Where did you go?”

“Chewie’s. He let me stay in his house until I graduated high school. He respected that I never wanted to speak to my father again. He disagreed with their decision to not tell me the truth. Chewie became my father-figure. He still checks up every once in awhile.”

“I think I'd like to meet him,” Rey said shyly.

Kylo smiled.  "I think he'd like that, too."

They stared at one another taking in the stories they had shared.  It was quiet, but comfortable as they studied each other.  Eventually, Rey looked away and shifted her hands on her lap.

"So, what are we doing today?"  Rey asked, looking down.

"Whatever you want.  I just have to go to work tomorrow," Kylo hesitated, "Are you going to be okay if I'm gone for most of the day?  You can stay here of course!  I'll even get you the spare key, and if you need anything, just call my office or cell and I will be here as soon as you need me to be.  Oh!  Speaking of, I'll leave both of those numbers on the counter."  Rey was looking at him with her wide, sad eyes.  "I have books you can read.  A TV and a thousand movies you can watch.  Plus food in the fridge and cupboards that you are welcome to.  Is there anything else you want or need?"

Rey chewed on her bottom lip and twisted her fingers together, not daring to look at him.  "Are you sure I can get ahold of you?"  Her voice was quiet, unsure.

"Of course! At any time too.  Just call and if I can't answer right away then I will call you right back.  I can be back here in fifteen minutes if anything bad happens, okay?  You don't have to worry."  Kylo reached out and placed one of his hands around the both of hers in her lap.  "I promise."

Rey gifted him with a small smile. "Okay."

Kylo smiled, feeling happier than he could describe.  This may of just been what he had been looking for his entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know when the next chapter will be posted but I will try to be more consistent! Tomorrow I get y wisdom teeth out, so wish me luck!!
> 
> If you have any ideas you would like me to incorporate, please let me know!! It helps my creative power ;)


	5. Sweet Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They finally get out of the apartment!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What?! Another update?!
> 
> Hope you guys like it :)

*Beep*Beep*Beep*

Kylo could hear his alarm, but had no real desire to react to it.  He was warm in his bed, still tired from last night.  A loud scuffle of blankets proceeded a small weight landing on his chest.  His breath escaped in a small _oof._ His eyes flew open to find a grinning hazel-eyed two-year-old.  Kylo felt himself smiling back up reflexively and affectionately wrapped his arms around the smiling boy.  The boy's floppy black hair fell in front of his face.  He wriggled in Kylo's arms and pulled a grubby hand out to push back his wayward locks.  The child's toothy grin never left his face.

"Da-ddy!"

Another high pitched voice screamed from his doorway.  Kylo looked over to see pink bows and brown curls hurl themselves onto his legs.  He could feel every boney knee and elbow as the pink bows and curls crawled up his legs to plant a big, wet kiss on his cheek.  Her five-year-old enthusiasm was contagious.  Kylo moved one arm from around his son to pull his daughter closer to him.  He started laying kisses on both children to their screaming delight.  He chuckled enjoying their laughter.

"Daddy!  Daddy!  Daddy!  Stop it!"  His daughter pulled away to look into his eyes.  Her brown eyes sparkled, a copy of his own. "Momma made pancakes!"

 Kylo grinned back at her and then at his son as he wiggled excitedly in his arms.

"Pa-cakes!"  The boy clapped his hands.

Kylo looked towards the bedroom door and saw Rey with another boy on her hip, chewing on his fingers.  Rey was beaming at Kylo with the two other kids.  Kylo grinned back at her.  She opened her mouth and said, "You need to wake up.  I don't know how to turn off the alarm."

Kylo looked at her, confused.  Insistent fingers were digging into his side.  His eyes flew open to see his arms empty and cold, his ears full of the beeping of the alarm.  Rey was poking his side to get him to turn off the alarm.  Kylo could feel an aching place in his heart he had thought was long gone.  He had to hold a hand to his heart for a moment trying to soothe the ache deep in his chest.  Rey's poking fingers lessened into curious wanderings.

"Are you okay?"

Kylo looked over to see Rey's concerned eyes.  He gave her a sad smile and switched the alarm off.  He leaned back against the pillows and closed his eyes, trying to cement the dream in his memory.  He had never felt more _content_ , more _happy_ , then he had in that dream.  He could almost feel guilty about dragging Rey into his dream, but pushed it down when he felt hesitant fingers on his bicep.

"Kylo?"

He slowly opened his eyes to see Rey leaning over him, one hand still on his bicep.  Her brow was creased, trying to figure out Kylo's expression.

He shook his head, trying to clear it.

"I'm okay, Rey.  It was just a dream."  Kylo closed his eyes again, rubbing his chest.

"A dream?"  Kylo opened his eyes to catch Rey's confused expression.  "What kind of dream?"

Kylo shifted so he was facing Rey, taking time to study her features. Her hazel eyes, so much like the boy he had held in his dreams.

He sighed.  "It was a good dream."

Rey looked at him confused, but didn't say anything else as he got up to go to the bathroom.  He closed the door behind him and turned on the sink.  He cupped his hands and brought the freezing water up to his face.  He looked into the mirror and saw his melancholy eyes boring into his reflection.  He snorted in disgust. All because of a simple dream.

He finished in the bathroom and came back into the bedroom to change into slacks and a white button-up.  Rey wasn't in the bed, so Kylo assumed she was in the kitchen.  He grabbed a suit jacket and made his way into the kitchen.  Rey was standing by the oven looking at the switches as though they had personally offended her.  Kylo smiled softly.

"What are you trying to do?"

Rey looked over her shoulder to roll her eyes at him.  "Your oven sucks.  It keeps burning your eggs."

Kylo barked out a laugh.  He looked over her shoulder to see a burning mass of what he assumed to be eggs.  He hip bumped Rey out of the way.  She snorted and shoved his shoulder.  Together they scrapped together a breakfast of toast and eggs and breakfasted together in contented quiet.  Kylo grabbed his briefcase and jacket.  Rey was standing with a somber expression.  Kylo gave her a small smile.  She walked up to where he was waiting by the door.  She hesitated, standing in front of him.  Kylo watched her silently, making no move away or towards her.  She hesitantly reached her arms towards him.  Kylo could feel the muscles in his cheeks stretching in a wide grin.  He gathered Rey up in his arms and felt her arms go around his waist.

"Have a good day," Rey muttered in his shirt.

Kylo grinned in her hair.  He couldn't seem to _stop_ smiling.  "You too, kid."

Impulsively, Kylo pressed a light kiss into her hair.  Rey quickly backed out of his embrace and refused to look up at him.

Cursing his stupidity, Kylo backed out the door with a "call me if you need anything!"  He hurried to his car, thoughts still focused on the small girl who had taken residence in his mostly lonely life.

***

 It was nearly lunchtime and Kylo hadn't heard anything from Rey.  More annoying was the dream still buzzing through his thoughts, making it near impossible to focus on the spreadsheets in front of him.  He had already been yelled at twice by Hux for spacing out during a ten minute meeting.  He was sure Hux would tell Snoke.  Good thing he had made it in early today.  Kylo sighed and pushed away from his desk.  He looked out the back window, watching the cars and people meander below.  He sighed again.  Finally, he grabbed his cell and called his home phone, hoping Rey would answer.

"Hello?"

Rey's hesitant voice brought a smile to his face.  Still facing the window, Kylo replied, "Hey, kid."

"Kylo!  How are you?"  Kylo chuckled at the excitement in Rey's voice.

"I'm good.  How has your day been?"

Rey hesitated.  "Good...?"

Kylo's brow furrowed.  "Okay.  Well, it's almost lunchtime for me here.  Would you like to meet me somewhere close to the apartment so we can eat together?"

Kylo held his breath waiting for Rey's response.  "Uh, sure!  Where would we go?"

Kylo let out a relieved breath of air and gave Rey directions to a small Italian restaurant and told her to meet him in half an hour.  They said their goodbyes and hung up.  Kylo stood smiling out the window when there was a throat being cleared behind him.  Kylo scowled, recognizing that sound from anywhere.

"Hux."

Kylo didn't bother turning around.

"Ren.  Mr. Snoke would like to speak with you in his office."  Hux sneered at Kylo's back.  "Hardly surprising considering your work ethic today."

Kylo barely resisted rolling his eyes as he shoved back the red-head on his way to Snoke's dim office.  He stopped in front of the door to Snoke's office and took a deep breath.  He dropped any semblance of emotion from his face and entered with a cool expression.  Snoke was sitting behind his desk, dwarfed by his high-backed chair.  The blinds were all closed, giving the room a foreboding feeling.  A single lamp was lit behind Snoke's chair rendering him nearly invisible, even with his sickly pale skin.  Snoke's gnarled hand extended to offer Kylo one of the seats in front of him.

Kylo took in Snoke's disproportional face.  It was said he used to run drugs from Mexico,  and when he outlived his usefulness, the drug leader ordered his brakes to be cut.  The supposed accident caused Snoke's face to become burned and scarred, leaving him to be a terrifying thing to behold.

For Kylo, this was just another day at work.

He was regularly called into Snoke's office like a misbehaving child in elementary school.

Snoke offered Kylo a twisted grimace in greeting.

"I'm sure you know why you are in here," Snoke's gravelly voice pushed into Kylo's consciousness. Kylo opened his mouth to respond, but Snoke pushed forward.  "You have been distracted and I want to know why."

Kylo felt his back stiffen even as he kept his expression neutral.  "I was sick on Friday and I am still recovering.  Nothing is distracting me."

Snoke's laugh made chills run up Kylo's spine.  He suppressed the shudder wanting to follow those chills, listening to what Snoke had to say.

"I know you, Kylo Ren.  You are not recovering from some _sickness_ ," he spat, "Instead, I think you met someone."  Snoke was studying every micro-expression of Kylo's.  Not for the first time, Kylo cursed his expressive eyes.  "Tell me."  Snoke's voice was the same low purr, but Kylo could sense the command-the _threat_ -behind the words.

"She means nothing, just a curiosity."  Kylo was dismissive outwardly.  Inwardly, he was scrambling.  He didn't know why, but he wanted to keep Rey a secret.  He barely knew her-or what she was hiding from.

Snoke hummed thoughtfully.  "Have you spoken to her since the weekend?"

Kylo thanked anyone listening that Rey and him had hardly spoken that morning.  "No. We have not."

Snoke narrowed his eyes.  "I expect you to be more focused in the future."  He snorted.  "To be distracted by a mere _girl_."  He dismissed Kylo with a wave of his hand, focus on his computer screen.

Kylo stood and didn't breath easy until he was behind his own office door.  Resolved to do more work before lunch, Kylo sat down and turned on his computer.

***

By the time Kylo turned off his computer, he was already late to his lunch date.  He grabbed his briefcase and jacket and quickly made his way to his car.  He sped to their meeting place and parked, stepping out fifteen minutes late.  He jogged across the street and looked into the restaurant.  Rey was sitting by the door, looking uncomfortable.  To her left, a man was trying to get her attention.  It looked, to Kylo, that Rey was trying to ignore him, but the man was persistent.  He was short by Kylo's standards, barely taller than Rey was.  His oily brown hair was slicked back and he had one arm working its way to the back of the chair Rey was sitting on.  Protectiveness flared in Kylo's gut.  He yanked the door open and stormed his way to where Rey was sitting.  Rey looked up at his stomping footsteps with a relieved and panicked look on her face.  She hopped out of her seat, nearly sprinting into the circle of his arms.  Her arms were tight around his chest, and Kylo felt his arms tighten around her shoulders reflexively.  Kylo glares at the man's shocked face.  He kept glancing at the back of Rey's head and Kylo's face, taking in his larger frame and the familiarity of his and Rey's embrace.

Rey pulled back slightly to smile at him.  "Hey."

"Hey, kid."  Kylo smiled at her sweet expression.  "Are you ready for lunch?"

Rey smiled and nodded, avoiding the man who had been trying to make a move on her.  Kylo dropped a kiss on her forehead as she stepped out of his embrace, causing her to giggle.  She took the hand he offered her.  She kept smiling up at him as a waitress led them to a corner booth in the back of the restaurant.  Rey slid in first and Kylo followed right after her.  Rey settled in close enough that Kylo could feel the slight heat radiating off of her on his side.  She was wearing a simple blue shirt and jeans with a black jacket that she sat next to her.  Her hair was back in its strange three buns.

Kylo couldn't help but stare.  Rey caught his gaze and raised one of her eyebrows.

"You look nice," Kylo said in defense.

Rey blushed.  "Thank you."  Her eyes flicked over him.  "You don't look too bad yourself."

Kylo smirked.  "I'll take what I can get."

They shared smiles until a waitress came and broke the spell between them, asking them what drinks they would like-Diet Coke for Kylo, raspberry lemonade for Rey-and if they were ready to order-they weren't.  The waitress left and Kylo was quick to break the silence.  "So, who was that guy?"

Rey's nose wrinkled in disgust.  "I have no idea.  I was sitting there waiting for you to get here, and he just decided he could talk to me.  He kept asking me for my name and if I was alone."  She scowled.  "I kept telling him I was waiting for someone, but the longer you took the less he believed me."

Inexplicable, she started to blush.

"What is it?"  Kylo asked, concerned.

"Well... I may have told him... you... you were my... boyfriend..."  She finished mumbling into her lap.

Kylo chuckled quietly and placed one of his hands on hers.  "You can call me your boyfriend anytime you need to."

Rey blushed harder and nodded.  Kylo nodded satisfied.

"Oh, and I'm very sorry for being late..."  Kylo looked mournfully over to Rey.  "My boss decided to yell at me some more."

Rey laughed at his puppy dog eyes.  "It's okay.  You saved me from that creep, so I forgive you."

The waitress came and asked for their orders.  Their conversation over lunch was easy, talking, laughing, and generally enjoying each other's company.  Kylo's lunch hour was coming to an end by the time they finished eating.  Kylo paid and tipped the waitress.  They made their way to the front door, pulling on their individual jackets.  They hesitated once they were outside.

"Well, I guess I'll see you later?"  Rey asked, fidgeting.

Kylo smiled.  "Yup.  I'll be home around five.  I'll see you then."

Rey smiled and hugged him once more.  "Drive safe."

"Call me once you get home."

They parted both smiling.  Kylo caught Rey sneaking glances at him, just as he was sneaking glances of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love all of your comments, ideas, and kudos! They give me life!! :)


	6. Getting to Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo finds out some more about Rey!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like it ;)
> 
> (I finally have an idea of where this is going, yay!!)

Kylo unlocked the apartment door, thoughts full of brown hair and hazel eyes. He pushed open the door to see Rey waiting worrying the edge of her shirt between her fingers, biting on her bottom lip. He smiled at her and went to change into regular clothes and rinse off the office from his hands and face. Rey followed him as he made his way to the bedroom. Kylo quirked an eyebrow at her. She stopped and took a steadying breath.

“I made dinner!”

Kylo smiled at her, taking in her apprehension. “You didn't have to do that.”

Rey ducked her head, shuffling her feet. “I know. I just wanted to.”

“Then I can't wait.” Rey gave him a weak smile. “I'm just going to change, if you want to wait in the kitchen?”  Rey turned and left without looking back at him.  Kylo frowned and changed into jeans and a t-shirt as fast as he could.  He walked into the kitchen and saw the table full of food.  Much more than two people could easily eat.  There were bowls of chips and salsa, chopped fruits and veggies, and even bowls of cheese.  He looked at Rey who was worrying her lip again.  He smiled and made a mental note to start making meals for Rey, instead of the other way around.  Rey relaxed slightly and smiled back.  She pulled out a chair and motioned Kylo into it.  Kylo kept his smile in place, even as his mind whirled at what was happening.

_This wasn't how it worked..._

He allowed Rey to seat him and place a napkin on his lap.  She started to load his plate with the best of each dish.  Kylo reached out and gently placed his hand on one of hers.

"Why are you doing this Rey?  You made dinner, I should be serving you, not the other way around."

Rey jerked away from him and dropped the serving spoon she had just been using.  "Are you... Are you mad?"

Kylo could barely hear her whisper over his own heartbeat.

"Mad?"  Kylo stood up and stepped close enough that they could almost touch.  "Why in the world would I be mad?  You made dinner when you didn't have to.  You sat me down and even dished up my plate for me.

Rey looked up at him in confusion.  "But...  You told me to stop."  Seeing his expression, Rey pressed on, "I'm living in your house, sleeping in your _bed_ , eating your food!"  She looked up at him, helpless.  "How else am I supposed to pay you back?  Because I will do nothing like... nothing like..."  She stopped, gasping for air.

Kylo was slow to understand what Rey was insinuating, but the horrifying realization was almost enough to cause him to vomit.

"No... No.  NO!"  Kylo gripped Rey's shoulders forcing her to look at him.  She trembled and Kylo forced his grip to lighten.  "Rey, you have to understand.  I would _never, ever_ expect or even _think_ about asking you to do something like that.  Do you understand?"  He kept switching his focus from one of her wide eyes to the other. "You don't have to pay me back.  You don't have to cook for me.  You don't have to clean for me.  You don't have to... _submit_ to me.  You don't even need to share a bed with me if it makes you uncomfortable.  You tell me you're uncomfortable with something and it will stop immediately, okay?"  Rey started to cry and lean into Kylo's grip.  He wrapped his arms around her back and let her cry into his shirt.  "I won't hurt you.  I promise, Rey.  I will do anything you need me to."

Rey's crying intensifies as she gripped his t-shirt t-shirt tightly, refusing to let go.  Kylo let her seek comfort in him, rubbing soothing circles on her shoulder blades and back.

"I... I even... left the apartment by my-my- _myself_ for _you_!"

Kylo froze.  He pulled back to see Rey's tear-stained face and downcast eyes.  "What are you talking about?"  Rey shut her mouth and refuses to speak.  "Rey were you uncomfortable with leaving the apartment without me?"  She nodded slowly.  "Sweetheart, you should have told me!  I would have never made you leave.  I could have come here and eaten or I could have come to get you."

Rey tensed and pulled away from him.  She hugged her arms close to herself, scrambling to the other side of the room.

"Please don't call me that," she whispered, just loud enough for him to hear.

"What?  Sweetheart?"  Rey flinched.  "Alright, alright.  I won't call you that, I swear."  He held up his hands in surrender.  "But swe-Rey... kid... I need you to tell me what you want and what lines you're uncomfortable crossing.  I need to know my boundaries so I don't push you away."   _Just like I've pushed everyone else away..._

"I'm sorry, Kylo."  He could barely hear her, but made no move to come closer.  She looked at him, tears still streaming down her cheeks.  "I'm not used to people," she paused, "people... like you..."

"What do you mean-people like me?"  He moves so he was sitting on the couch.  "I'm pretty normal, all things considered."

"No."  Rey shook her head violently.  "No, you're not."  She moved closer and sat on the opposite side of the couch as him.  "Where I come from, everything has a price.  You learn pretty quickly what you're willing to sell."  She sighed, letting the last of her tears spill from her eyes.  "Nothing is free.  The things that you have done for me would be beyond my payment.  I would _owe_ you something.  And when you owe someone something, they own you.  The longer it takes you to pay, the steeper the price is.  They choose how you can pay them back."  She shut her eyes, seemingly lost in her memories.

Kylo felt fury slowly burning in his gut as he began to understand what Rey was implying.  His fists clenched, but he refused to move an inch.  He was unsure what Rey needed, but as soon as figured it out, he would do whatever it was to keep her safe and comforted.

She turned her wide, pleading eyes on him.   _He would do anything if she kept looking at him like that._  "Please, Kylo."

He didn't know what she was asking, but nodded anyway.  He had already made his decision.

She smiled weakly and laid back on the couch, sinking into the cushions.  Kylo watched her for a few moments-until her breathing leveled out-and stood up to clear away dinner.  He had lost his appetite.  Rey shifted as Kylo stood, but only let out a small puff of air before settling down again.  He gave her sprawled form a half smile.  His thoughts whirled from everything she had told him.  He couldn't sit still.  Dinner was cleared and put away in record time.  He swept, wiped the counters, hand washed the few dishes by the sink, tidied the books Rey must have taken down, adjusted the line pillow Rey wasn't using, set a blanket across her shoulders, and watered the lone plant on the window pane.  His fingers were still itching to do more even as his apartment was cleaner than he ever remembered it being.  He sat down on an armchair, not far from where Rey slept on the couch, and studied her.  She looked peaceful and painfully young, wrapped in one of his blankets.  His mind wandered back to his dream, as it had for the entire day.  He could almost feel his two children in his arms as he closed his eyes.  He sighed at the dull ache throbbing in his heart.  He tried to turn his attention back to Rey's worries, but continually found himself sucked back into his daydreams.  He could imagine his pounding heart as he got down on one knee.  He could almost see a positive pregnancy test and a round belly.  He could feel the small weight of his newborn child in his arms...  His eyes flew open at the touch of fingers against his face.

"Kylo?  Why are you crying?"  Rey's sleepy voice drifting.

Kylo brought one hand to his face, and to his surprise, it came away wet.  He shook his head and wiped away the tracks his tears had left behind on his angular face.  "It's nothing, Rey.  I was just thinking, that's all."

Rey frowned, clearly not pleased with his answer.  She looked as though she might push the subject, so Kylo interrupted before she could say anything.  "Do you want to sleep alone tonight?"

"Her surprised face would have amused him, if he hadn't known what she was surprised.  She studied his face carefully.  He made sure to keep his face open, allowing her to see what she needed to.

"Maybe just tonight..."  Rey's voice was hardly a whisper.

Kylo nodded, crushing the disappointment that bloomed like dandelions in his gut.

"I insist you take the bed and I won't take no for an answer," Kylo said quickly, as he saw her start to argue.  "I will get ready for bed, steal a pillow and blanket, then sleep on the couch, okay?  If you need anything I'm right out here."

At her nod, Kylo went into the bedroom.  He was ready quickly and grabbed his pillow and one of the blankets in his closet.  Rey was coming in the room as he was leaving.  She stepped aside to let him through the door.

As he passed, he smiled and said, "Sleep well, kid!"

He turned his back and heard a faint "goodnight, Kylo" before Rey was shutting-and locking-the bedroom door.

He sighed, but didn't begrudge her for it.  After all, he _was_ the one having strange dreams, and daydreams, about her.

***

The following week was tense.  Rey would let Kylo make breakfast and dinner for them, but would barely speak.  She still hadn't invited Kylo back to the bedroom, and Kylo's back protested.  The only change was that she stopped locking the door behind her, releasing some tension in Kylo's chest that he wasn't aware was even there.  His temper was short at work and he could barely get anything done, racking his brains for anything to make-up with Rey, as he was.  On his way to work on Friday, he was struck with an epiphany.  He was fidgety throughout work and nearly sprinted to his car as soon as he possibly could.  He pulled out his phone, flipping through his contacts before he found the right one.  He dialed the number and put the phone to his ear, impatiently listening to it ring.

A familiar, gruff voice answers.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Chewie."

"Benny!  Oh!  Right, it's Kylo now.  Sorry about that, kid."  Kylo smiled at his uncle's slip up.  It happened every time he called, but he hardly minded when he owed this man his life.  "Me and Maz were worried when you didn't call last Sunday.  I wanted to drive up to make sure you weren't making mischief, but Max said you'd call, and you know she's always right.  Speaking of,"  Kylo pulled the phone away from his ear in preparation for Chewie's roar.  "MAZ!  BE-KYLO'S ON THE PHONE!"  Kylo grinned as he heard the two bicker about how to turn the speaker on on the phone.

_I should really go back soon._

"Kylo Ren?  What are you calling on a Friday evening for?  You know it's me and Chewie's date night."  Maz's accusing voice flies at him, but he can sense the warm affection buried in the harsh tone.

"I'm sorry Maz.  I just need some advice."

"So.  A girl has finally caught the eye of our very own Kylo Ren."  He could hear Chewie trying to hold in his guffawing laughter.  "What do you need help with?"

Kylo blushed.  "Well..."

***

 Rey was helping Kylo clean the dishes after dinner.  It had been mostly quiet, the barest of civilities passing between the two.  Kylo watched as Rey seemed hyper focused on the task in front of her.  He cleared his threat and saw Rey jump a little before glancing up at him.

"So, uh, what do you want to do tomorrow?"

She shrugged, turning back to the dwindling pile of dishes in front of her.

"We can do whatever you want.  Or you can do what you want, if you'd rather be alone?"

Rey shrugged again, still not looking at him.

"My uncle, Chewie, invited me over to have dinner with him and Maz tomorrow.  You're welcome to come."

"Who's Maz?"

Her voice seemed rough-it could be from disuse-but Kylo was relieved to hear it anyways.  He smiled and looked back at the plate he was washing.

"She's Chewie's wife.  They got married when I graduated college.  She was our neighbor, and somehow she snagged the old bachelor.  She's a little eccentric, but I'm sure you'll love her."  He paused, taking in Rey's enraptured expression.  "And I know she'll love you."

He may have imagined it, but Kylo thought he saw tears in her eyes as she nodded her head and whispered a soft "okay."

***

"Kylo?"

Kylo's head shot up from the book he was reading at the sound of Rey's voice coming from the bedroom.

"Yes?"  He was hesitant.  This was the first time she had initiated conversation since a week ago.

"Um, what should I wear to dinner tonight?"  Her voice was quiet, muffled from the wall separating them.

Kylo smiled.  "Whatever you want, kid.  It's just dinner, nothing too fancy."

Rey walked out of the bedroom with a slight frown on her face.  She didn't say anything out loud, but her body language was loud and clear.  This wasn't _just_ a dinner for her.

"Well, then what are you going to wear?"

Kylo gestured towards his black t-shirt and jeans.  "This."

Rey harrumphed and turned back to change.  Kylo checked the time.  They still had plenty of time before they had to leave.  He decided to humor her.

"Do you have any ideas?"  He called out.

"Like two," she paused, "Do you want to see them?"

Kylo's eyebrows shot up.  He quickly schooled his expression before she could see.  "If you want me to, then sure."

"Yeah.  Maybe you can help me decide."  Her blushing face peeked around the corner.  She motioned him to follow her inside.  Kylo took a few seconds just trying to take in everything.  It was a _disaster_.  Clothes and shoes were strewn _everywhere_.  He even saw the make-up bag he had gifted her- _not that she needed it_ -spilled across the bed.  He looked back at Rey, who was studying him nervously, and chuckled.

"So which outfits are we choosing between?"

She visibly relaxed and pointed to where two piles of clothes laid side by side on the bed.  Rey picked up one pile and handed it to him.  He walked to where she had just moved the clothes from and sat down.  She had chosen a black band tee and cut off shorts. He picked up the other pile and saw a red and black flannel with a black pencil skirt.

Kylo hummed thoughtfully.  "What do you like about each of them?"

"Well," Rey blushed, "I like the black shirt, because it's kinda like what you wear all the time."  Kylo couldn't help but smile.  "And I thought the shorts looked good with it.  But I liked the red shirt, too.  So, I put it with the skirt, because I wasn't sure how fancy it was..."  She trailed off, glaring at Kylo's amused face.  "What?"  She snapped.

_Nothing you're just cute._

He wanted to say it.  He wanted to say it _so bad_ , but she was only just talking to him again and he refused to push his luck.

"Nothing."  Kylo cleared his throat, looking at the clothes in his hands.  "I would suggest the tee and flannel with some jeans if I were you.  It might get cold on the ride back."

Rey beamed at him as she took the clothes back from him, and Kylo's pathetic heart melted at the sight.  Maybe he was was finally making the right choice.

Or maybe he was falling in love.

And wasn't that a scary thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally I wanted to have the dinner in this chapter but it was getting SO LONG so it'll be in the next chapter!
> 
> You guys are the best!!! Every kudo and comment has warmed my heart, so I just wanted to give a big thank you!!
> 
> Again, if you guys have any ideas, I would LOVE to hear them!!


	7. Dinner and a Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some new friends are made. Kylo and Rey go to a park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love all of your guy's comments and patience with me! I wouldn't be here without you guy <3

The ride was quiet, but lacking the tension that had been present all week.  Rey was silently watching the city pass her by.  Kylo let her sit, lost in thought for the entire ride there.  The drive wasn't long and Kylo hurried to Rey's side to open her door for her once they pulled into Maz and Chewie's driveway.  She gave him a shy smile and stopped right next to him, following him close.  She hesitated as they neared the front door.  She gripped his forearm, pulling him to a stop.  Kylo turned and looked into her panicked eyes.  Her grip was tight, but her hands shook.

Kylo covered her hand with his own and gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile.  "They're going to love you."

The words seemed to comfort Rey a little and she let go of her death grip.  They finally reached the door and Kylo knocked, focus still on the trembling girl beside him.  He heard Chewie's distinctive stomp on the other side of the door.  The door swung open hand revealed Chewie grinning with his arms outstretched and tanned skin stretched into a wide grin.  His brown hair hung almost to his waist, streaks of grey by his temples and throughout his shaggy beard.  His eyebrows were big and bushy, arms and legs coated in long hair as well.  There wasn't a spot on his body that didn't seem covered in hair.  He was almost a full head taller than Kylo and often used it to his advantage.  Chewie's bright blue eyes shine with love and amusement as he took in Kylo and Rey.

"B-Kylo!  I'm glad to see you made it safely."  His deep voice rumbled through his barrel chest. He pulled Kylo into his customary bear hug and ruffled Kylo's hair like he had since he was a kid.  Chewie turned his warm eyes onto Rey who had backed up behind Kylo.  "You must be Rey.  Kylo's told us so much about you."  Rey gave him a shy smile.  Chewie offered his hand towards her.  She stared at the offered mitt for a long moment before hesitantly placing her tiny hand in his much larger-and hairier-one.  Chewie smiled at Rey one last time, dropping her hand and waving them inside.  Kylo motioned for Rey to go in before him.  He watched as Rey took in everything.  The walls were covered in pictures of him, Maz, and Chewie.  Rey drank in each one of them like a woman dying of thirst.  She reverently touches the frame of Maz and Chewie's wedding.  They were holding hands and smiling at each other with all the love in the world despite their laughable height difference.  Kylo had taken it himself and thought fondly of that day.  She stopped next at a cringe worthy high school senior picture of himself.  He wouldn't call himself a goth, but with his dark hair and eyes and preference for dark colors, he almost looked it.  He even had a scowl and slouch in the picture.

Rey giggled and turned to look at him.  "Is that you?"

Kylo could feel his ears burn as he nodded, hoping against hope that he wasn't blushing.

"You look so little!"  She turned back to the picture and gave another small giggle.  "How old were you?"

Kylo shrugged.  "Eighteen, I think."

"Oh!  That's my age, too."  She turned to continue browsing the pictures hung on the walls.

Kylo felt as though he had just been punched in the gut.  All of the air escaped his lungs and he swore his heart stopped beating in his chest.  The only word in his head was _eighteen_.  He had suspected she was young, but _eighteen_?  She was a kid, a baby.  He was nine years her senior.  He was disgusted with himself.  He had had _dreams_ about her with _him_ and she was _eighteen_.

"Kylo Ren!  What are you doing standing in the hall like an idiot?" Maz's loud voice echoed down the short hallway to reach him and snap him out of his shock.

"Hey, Maz.  It's good to see you." Kylo walked to give the short woman who had become a second mother to him a hug that she returned fiercely.

"It's been too long."

Kylo silently agreed with her as she lead him into the kitchen where Rey was waiting awkwardly with Chewie.  When Rey saw him, she hurried over to his side.  He gave her a reassuring smile.  She lifted one side of her mouth into a slight grimace.  The sight caused Kylo to smile even bigger and lean over the whisper in her ear.

"Are you enjoying being with my family?"

Rey shivered as he drew away from her.  She looked up at him and nodded before dropping her eyes to look back down at the ground.  They didn't talk again until dinner had been set out.  Maz's many bracelets clinked and tinkered as she dished up food for everyone.  Kylo could see the love between her and his uncle in the small touches and lingering glances and secretly yearned for it one day himself.  He looked at Rey's young face.

_Maybe even with her..._

"So, Rey, how did you end up meeting my boy Kylo here?"  Maz asked, bespeckled eyes landing on Rey.

Rey nearly choked on the water she had been drinking.  "Um... Uh..."

"We met outside my apartments."  Kylo interrupted, giving Maz a stern look.

"Ah, right."  Maz never turned her attention away from Rey.  "Did you know that in the past fifteen or so years I have known Kylo, you are the first girl he has ever brought home?"

Rey's eyes were wide and her jaw had dropped as she looked over at him.

Kylo's face burned in embarrassment.  "Maz!"

"What?  It's true."  She turned her attention back to Rey.  "It makes me curious, is all."

Rey was blushing as she stared at her half-eaten plate.  Kylo fidgeted in his seat, praying to anyone listening to save him and Rey from this embarrassment.

"Ah, Maz!  Leave the kids alone.  They're shy."  Chewie, like the saint he was, saved them from his wife's interrogation.

They finished the meal in relative peace.  They all helped clear away the food and dishes.  Kylo lead Rey into the living room with Maz and Chewie following soon after.  Rey went back to looking at the extensive collection of pictures.

"Hey, kid."  Chewie's growl pulled Kylo out of his own thoughts-mostly involving a certain brunette.  To his chagrin, Rey turned at the endearment as well.  Chewie noticed and raised an eyebrow at Kylo who only blushed and shrugged.  "I want you to come see this."  He gestured vaguely towards the garage.

"Alright."  He looked at Rey whose eyes were locked on him.  He could see the panic building in her hazel orbs.  "I'll only be gone a few minutes.  I'm not even going to leave the house.  Is that okay?"

Rey dropped her eyes to her hands.  She slowly nodded.

"Alright, I'll see you soon."

Kylo followed Chewie, hoping Maz could work her magic on Rey, like she had on him.

Chewie waited until they were out of earshot of the two women before he turned his attention to Kylo.

"What was that about?"

Kylo sighed.  Chewie wasn't known to beat around the bush.  "It happens almost every time I leave her sight.  She needs to know where I'm going and that I'll be back."  He hesitated, taking in his uncle's concerned expression. "I think... I think she has some abandonment issues."

Chewie sighed.  "I don't think that's her biggest issue."

Kylo had nothing to say to that.  It was one of his thoughts that he had tried to shove down in the furthest part of his mind.  He agreed with Chewie and it _terrified_ him.  He sighed instead looking at the hulking figure that had saved his life many times over.  He shuddered to think of what his life would have been without his uncle's diligent love.  "How long do you think Rey can stand being alone with Maz?"

Chewie chuckled.  "I thought that's why you brought the girl!"

"Of course it was!"  Kylo smiled.  "I can't help but worry about her."

Chewie stared down at him with his knowing eyes.  "Ben."  He shook his mane.  "Kylo.  I don't know much about this girl, but I'm worried for and about you.  What if she's a runaway?  What if she's some kind of criminal?"

"Thank you for your concern, Chewie, really," Kylo cut his uncle off, "but I think she's just a scared kid."  He looked at his gentle, understanding uncle.  "She has nightmares.  I know because I can hear her.  Remember when I first moved in with you?"  Chewie's eyes softened.  "You had to keep an eye on me at all times.  I tried to run away at least twelve times that first week, but you talked me out of it every time."  Kylo's throats started to close with emotion while Chewie's eyes shone with tears.  "I don't know where I'd be without you, Chewbacca.  And I want to be that kind of person for Rey, no matter what."

Tears fell into both men's cheeks as they moved to embrace each other.  Kylo never felt safer than when he was in one of Chewie's bear hugs.  Their embrace only ended when a throats was cleared behind Chewie.  They broke apart, each trying-and failing-to hide the evidence of their tears.  Maz stood knowingly as she watched her husband and her adopted son step apart.  Rey scurried from behind Maz to stand in front of Kylo.  Her eyes were red-rimmed and it seemed like she had been crying earlier as well.  She gave him a sweet smile.  Kylo's heart stuttered in his chest at the sight.  He had missed this smile.  He returned her smile with one of his own.  Rey looked into his eye, seeming to notice his tears for the first time.  She gently rubbed the tears he had missed away and cupped his cheek.  He leaned into the contact, entirely too pleased she had decided to do it.  After a moment, that seemed too brief for Kylo, she pulled her hand away, fingers lingering and tracing a pathway down his jaw.  His breath caught in his chest.

"Lets go home."  His voice was breathless, much to his embarrassment.

"Okay."  Her voice was quiet, but strong.

He turned to see Chewie and Maz looking at them, pleased.

"Chewie.  Maz.  Thank you for everything.  You're going to have to come up to our apartment and have dinner sometime."

"We'd like that."  Maz pulled away from Chewie to give Kylo a hug.  To his surprise, she also pulled Rey into a hug that she eagerly accepted.

Chewie stepped up next and pulled Kylo into one more bear hug.  "I'll see you around kid."

"I'll see you, Chewie."  He smiled at his uncle who shook Rey's hand and bid their farewells.

Rey allowed him to open her car door and they were soon off.  Rey fiddled with the radio for a moment before finding a song she liked.  Kylo smiled as Rey sang along to a song he didn't know.  Their car ride back was filled with Rey's clear voice singing to the songs she knew and humming to the ones she didn't.  The ride passed quickly and soon Kylo was opening Rey's door once more.  They silently made their way into the apartment.  Kylo went to fetch his pajamas, resigned to another night on the couch, when Rey's voice stopped him.

"Uh, Kylo?"

"Yeah, kid?"  He asked turning around.  She was biting her lip and looking at where her toes were scuffing the floor.

"Um, well I was thinking."  She stopped.

"About what?"  Kylo was starting to get nervous.

"Well, the couch must be really uncomfortable to sleep on."

Kylo shrugged.  "It's not too bad."

Rey flushed red and refused to meet his eyes.  "Well, uh, um...  You could sleep on the bed...  with me..."  Her whisper was almost unintelligible.

"Really?  Are you sure you're okay with that?"  Kylo asked surprised.  Rey simply nodded.  Kylo grinned.  "Okay."

Rey's head snapped up, looked at him, and snapped down again.

"Okay."

They were both ready for bed quickly.  Kylo brought in the pillows he had been using and set them in his usual spot.  He laid down under the covers, facing away from where Rey would be sleeping.  He felt her slide in next to him and smiled.  He breathed in Rey's scent that had saturated his side of the bed.  He almost gasped in wonder.

_She had slept on his side of the bed._

Kylo fell asleep with a smile on his face and Rey's warmth on his back.

***

Sunday dawned with Rey sleeping on her stomach and Kylo curled on his side beside her.  One of his arms was stretched across her shoulders.  He smiled lazily, enjoying the peaceful moment before forcing his arm away from her.  Rey shifted closer as he moved away, her lips shifting to a small pout.  Kylo smiled fondly at her sleeping form.  He lightly brushed some hair out of her face.  She mumbled and squirmed deeper into the mattress.  He sighed and forced himself up.  She was too dang cute for Kylo to handle.  He showered and got ready for the rest of the day.  By the time he left the bathroom, Rey was awake and watching him from the bed.

He looked at her, smiled, and gave a friendly, "Good morning!"

She gave him a tired half-smile as he put his dirty clothes away.

"What do you want to do today?"

Rey perked up immediately.  "Well, when I was talking to Maz she mentioned this park, I don't remember what it was called, but it had lots of trees and sounded really amazing!"

"I bet it was Naboo Park.  That's my favorite park.  We can go as soon as we eat breakfast if you want."

Rey nodded enthusiastically and they left within the hour.  Rey bounced excitedly in her seat for the entire car ride, just waiting to arrive.  Her eyes widened as she took in the tall trees and wildflowers that Naboo Park was known for.  Kylo smiled at Rey's awed face.  They slowly made their way through the park, with Rey stopping at every new flower and tree they came across.  Kylo made a mental note to get some more plants for their apartment if Rey was going to keep looking at the overgrowth like that.  She smiled at him and dragged him over the park.  He in turn showed her the tree he had fallen out of when he was seven and broken his arm.  He told her how his uncle had to be the one who took him to the hospital, because his parents were too busy yelling at each other to get him there themselves.  She laughed as he told her all the mischief he and Chewie had gotten into in this very park.  Kylo picked some baby's breath flowers and stuck them around Rey's single bun at the top of her head.  She laughed when he told her looked like a princess, but she was blushing, so Kylo smiled, adding it to one of his favorite memories.  They walked back after exploring the entire park and their stomachs demanded to be filled.  Rey hummed, half a step behind him.  Kylo smiled at nothing, completely content to just spend time in Rey's company.

He was jerked back into reality as Rey stopped humming.  He turned around to see a blob of a man gripping the top of Rey's arm and nearly spitting in her face.

"Girl."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, but I had to leave a cliffhanger! Please don't hate me!!
> 
> As always, I would love your opinion and if you have anything that you'd like to see, just tell me!! :)


	8. I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fallout from an uncomfortable guest and some new surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took sooooo long! All I can say is I'm so sorry!
> 
> I hope you guys like it!! :)

"Girl."

The blob completely ignored Kylo.  His eyes were fixed on Rey.

Kylo did not like this one bit.

"How-how did you find me?"  Rey's voice was shaking in terror.

His laugh was cruel.  "Did you really think you could get away from me?"

Kylo could feel a protective rage wash over him.  He shoved the vile man away, stepping in between him and Rey.  She held onto the back of his shirt and peeked around his shoulder as he glared the blob down.

"Don't touch her," Kylo growled.

"Who are you?"  The man snorted, dismissive, eyes still fixed on Rey.

Kylo's anger flared.  The only thing keeping him from actually beating the guy was Rey's hands on his back and arm.  "We're going."  He turned and moved Rey along with a hand at the small of her back.  Her hands were still gripping the sleeve of his shirt.

"Hey, now!  That _girl_ owes me a debt!"  Kylo refused to stop moving Rey to the car.  "And now she has to _pay_."

The way the odious man caressed the word ' _pay_ ' made a chill of horror curl down Kylo's spine.  Rey was ripped off of Kylo's arm.  He turned and saw _that man_ trying to drag Rey towards him again.  Kylo saw red and struck the man right in his triple chin.  His grip on Rey's arm loosened and Kylo basically shoved Rey into her seat, carefully closed her door, and locked her in before turning back to see the damage he caused.  The disgusting creature was trying to catch his breath and blood ran from his lip.

_He must have bitten his lip when I hit him..._

Kylo found that he couldn't regret what he had done.  His blood was still boiling looking at the blob's disgusting display.

"She owes you _nothing_."  Kylo bared his teeth in a snarl, fists clenched.  "Now I would suggest you _leave_."

He didn't walk-or slink-away like Kylo thought he would.  Instead he laughed.  "Careless boy.  I'm patient.  And I will get my... _payment_."  His lips curled into a self-satisfied expression, even with the blood on his face.

Kylo couldn't do anything but let out an inhuman snarl and slam his door shut as he got into the car, peeling out of the parking lot.  He could see out of the corner of his eye that Rey was trembling and trying not to break, arms wrapped around her legs.  Kylo's rage bled out as he looked over at Rey's shaking form.

"Who was that man?"  Kylo whispered softly.

Rey's panting breath was the only noise in the car.  Kylo pulled the car over as quickly as he could.  He leaned over to put one hand on Rey's arm as soon as they stopped.  He could see where that disgusting man's grip was starting to bruise.  Kylo could feel his anger growing, but pushed it aside so he could focus on Rey.

_Not that he hadn't been already..._

Rey jumped at the light contact.  She looked at him in true terror.  Kylo yanked his hand back, feeling like he had ice water dumped down his back.  She was in a full blown panic attack.  Her breath was quick and shallow, her entire frame was shaking, and her eyes were unfocused.  Tears mixed with snot on their trek down her face.  Kylo's hands itches to do something, but he wasn't sure what he was allowed.

"Rey, he's gone now."  She didn't seem to hear him.  "I'm here.  I'll always be here."  He set one hand on her trembling arm.  "I won't leave you."  She shuddered and leaned into his touch.  "We're going to go home and get some hot chocolate, okay?  We'll be there in just a minute."  Kylo kept his voice low and soothing, easing them back into the road.  There wasn't much he could do for her in the car.  Once they reached the apartment though...

In less than five minutes they were parked again.  Kylo looked around them making sure that disgusting creature had not followed them.  He thought he saw some movement on the street corner, but passed it off as his paranoia.  He opened Rey's door but she didn't move.

"Rey?"  She stared straight ahead.  "Kid?"

Her head slowly turned towards him.  She was still shaking and sobbing.  Like a small child, she raised up both arms towards him.  Kylo wasted no time in pulling her as close as possible.  She sobbed into his shoulder with her arms tight around his neck.  Kylo gently crushed her to his chest, rubbing up and down her back.

"Lets get inside, kid," Kylo whispered in her ear.

She nodded but didn't let go of him.  He could hear her sniffling close to his ear.  Kylo scooped her up, much like he did when they first met, only this time she was awake and clinging to him.  He kept her close as he navigated them into the apartment.  Rey's sobbing had not stopped and seemed to be getting worse.  He shut and locked the door behind them and then sat on the couch with Rey across his lap.  Kylo gently rocked her, hushed her, stroking her hair and back.  Slowly, Rey stopped trembling.  Her breathing evened out and Kylo could feel her relaxing.  He rested his cheek on top of her head, still rocking.  Rey's grip relaxed around his neck as she snuggled deeper into his chest, seemingly content for the moment.  Some of her baby hairs were tickling Kylo's nose.  He tried to discreetly smooth it away, to no avail.  The tickling increased until he had to turn away from Rey to let out a big sneeze.  Rey jumped at the noise and his sudden movement, pulling away to give him one of her wide-eyed looks.

She reached up one hand to place on his cheek.  "Are you sick?"

Kylo smiled at her concern.  "Nope.  Just a tickle."  His eyes glowed with amusement.  Rey looked at him with confusion, staring deeply into his eyes.  "Do you want hot chocolate?"  Rey grinned and nodded enthusiastically.  Kylo grinned back.  "Alright, but you're going to have to stand up first."

She quickly scrambled up and off him, thrusting her elbow into his his gut hard enough to knock the wind out of him in her haste.

"Oh my gosh!  I'm so sorry!  Are you okay?"

Kylo waved off her apology, trying to get some air back into his struggling lungs.

"Kylo?"

Kylo took in three deep breaths before looking into Rey's deeply concerned eyes.  She was wringing her hands, shifting from foot to foot in front of his slumped form on the couch.  Kylo sat up and reached out to place his left hand on her right hip.  He smiled up at her, feeling her tense up from this new touch.

"I'm all right, Rey."  She relaxed slightly.  "Lets make that hot chocolate now."

She smiled down at him.  Kylo grinned back like the idiot he was and patted her hip before standing up and walking into the kitchen that still wasn't clean from breakfast.  He smiled as he saw the two sets of dishes sitting by the sink.  Kylo had always been a solitary person.  He never had lots of friends growing up and barely had any friends now that he was grown up.  He couldn't believe how much enjoyment he would get from sharing a space with someone else.  He enjoyed Rey messing up his kitchen and his bed.  Kylo blushed as he thought of how they had shared his bed night after night.  He looked over his shoulder to see Rey settling herself on one of the seats by the island.  She seemed comfortable-much more comfortable than when he first brought her here.  Kylo froze as he was about to scoop the flavoring for the hot chocolate in.

_I've never asked her if she wants to stay here._

Rey noticed his hesitation.

"Kylo?  Are you okay?"

Kylo shook his head.  "Rey?  Do you...  Do you _want_ to stay here...with me?"  Rey looked up at him in speechless surprise.  "I mean, I never asked.  I just assumed.  I don't want to assume anything and I really enjoy having you here, but you could stay with Maz and Chewie or I could take you somewhere...?"

Kylo trailed off as Rey started laughing.  It was his turn to stand in stunned silence.  She kept laughing and laughing until tears streamed down her face, and she continued laughing.  Kylo stood in front of her awkwardly, waiting for her to tell him what was going on.  Rey straightened up, wiped her eyes, looked up at him, and started to crack up again.

"Rey," Kylo whined, "Please."

Rey's giggles settled as she pulled him to sit on the chair next to her.

"You're silly, you know."  Rey's eyes twinkled with teasing.

"What?"

Rey giggled at his ridiculous face.

"You.  You're silly.  You worry about silly stuff.  If I had wanted to leave, I would have already."  Rey gave him a huge smile.  "And see?  I'm still here."

Kylo smiled back and reached for one of her hands.

"You're still here."  His voice was reverent, worshipful.

Rey squeezed his hand and Kylo felt the warmth of that squeeze wrap around his heart.  He didn't understand what he was feeling, but he wanted to hold that feeling tight for the rest of his life.

***

Kylo sat staring at the same page of numbers as he had for the last half hour.  He kept having dreams of Rey and his own family.  Sometimes it was with all three children, sometimes less.  But it was always the same kids in the same order.  Kylo frowned as he thought of what that meant.  But last night was different.  Last night was all about Rey and him.

_"Come on, Ben!"  Rey giggled as she tugged on Kylo's arm.  "Hurry up!  I wanna see the baby elephant!"_

_Kylo felt himself smiling at her energy.  She could go for miles and miles with her enthusiasm, all while dragging him along for the ride._

_"Okay, kid, I'm coming.  But the baby elephant isn't going anywhere soon."_

_Rey crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue at him and she pulled him along faster._

Rey's ringtone sliced through Kylo's memory.  He scrambled to answer quickly, heart pounding thinking somehow thinking about her had conjured her up.   _She couldn't have heard what I was thinking..._

"Rey?"  His voice was slightly panicked.  "Are you okay?"

"Kylo?  Someone's at the door...  They won't go away..."  Rey sounded terrified.  Kylo's thoughts flew immediately to the ogre in the park.  He had already forgotten the creep's name.

"Don't open the door.  I'll be there in seven minutes."  It usually took him fifteen to get home, but he wasn't going to be following pesky speed limits when Rey could be in danger.  Kylo started throwing random items into his briefcase, all thoughts focused on Rey, alone, terrified, and someone on the other side of the door.

"Hurry, Kylo,"  Rey dropped her wavering voice, "I'm scared..."

Kylo's heart froze in his chest at her admission.  "Lock yourself in the bedroom and the bathroom.  I'll call you when you can come out."  Kylo softened his hard hard tone, "I'll take care of ya, kid.  Don't worry."

"I know you will."

Kylo's heart swelled at her words. "Do you need me to stay on the phone?"

"Would you?"

"Of corse, kid.  Anything."

Ret quiets at his admission.  Kylo hoped against hope she didn't figure how much "anything" really was.

"You still there?"

"Yup.  I'm just locking myself in the bathroom right now."

Kylo stomped his way through the office, ignoring all the stares he was getting.  They were unimportant.  Rey was important.

"How long have they been at the door now?"  Kylo threw himself into his car and igniting the engine.

"About ten minutes now."

Kylo's jaw dropped.  No one knocks for ten minutes.

"Okay..."

"Ya."

Silence falls between the two for a moment.

"How far away are you?"

"Three minutes."

"Please hurry, Kylo."

"I'm going as fast as I can, sweethear-"  The pet name slipped through his lips so easily, he barely caught himself.  He heard Rey's sharp intake of breath.  "I'm so sorry, Rey.  I didn't mean to.  I swear, it just slipped out."

"It's...okay."  Rey's voice strengthened.  "I'm okay, Kylo.  I just like hearing your voice."

Kylo blushed from his neck to the tops of his ears.  "I-I like hearing your voice, too."

Rey swallowed hard on the other side of the line.  "Kylo..."

Kylo pulled into the parking lot before she could decide what to say.  Kylo felt slightly disappointed at that.  "I'm here Rey. I'll call you as soon as I can. I promise."

"Kylo?"

Her worries tone set Kylo's teeth on edge.  "Ya?"

"Be safe."

"Promise."  Kylo stormed up the stairs.  Without thinking he uttered a quick "love ya", and hung up, mind completely focused on removing whoever was bothering Rey by any means possible.

He rounded the corner to where the door of his apartment was and stopped in his tracks.  It was indeed a man.  A huge, hairy man.

"Chewie?"  Kylo locked around confused but saw no one else.  "What the heck are you doing here?"

Chewie whirled around and gave Kylo a huge grin.  "Hey, kid!"

Kylo's mouth gaped. "What-"

"Oh, I'm just here to drop some things off."  He lifted up a plastic bag for Kylo to see.  He couldn't make out any of the items, as he was still in shock.  "Maz's orders."  Chewie shrugged.

"You scared the crap out of Rey!  She called me at work and she never does that.  Plus-"  Lylo cut himself off, glancing around to make sure no one was eavesdropping on their conversation.  "Well, come inside them," Kylo grumbled.

Chewie sauntered into his apartment like he owned the place.  Big surprise there.  Chewie could make himself at home in the richest of buildings and the seediest of buildings.  Didn't matter.  Nothing fazed Chewbacca.  Kylo rolled his eyes and called Rey.

"Kylo!  Someone's inside!  Please tell me it's you."  Rey's panicked whisper tore at his heart.

"Come on out, kid.  Everything's fine.  It's just Chewie being Chewie."  Kylo shot a glare at his mischievous uncle, who only grinned.

"Okay.  One second."

Rey hung up and Kylo walked to the bedroom door to meet her.  The lock clicked and Rey threw open the door.  Seeing Kylo, she launched herself into his arms, seeking comfort against his chest.  Kylo squeezed her as tight as he dared.  She was such a tiny thing...

"I'm so glad you're here," Rey's voice cracked.  "I was so scared."

"Shh, it's okay, kid.  I'll always be here."  Kylo gently strokes her back, soothing her hitched breathing.

When she finally pulled away, Kylo took in her red, swollen eyes and tear-stained cheeks.  He reached out a hand to smear the remaining moisture off her cheeks.  Rey breathed out a soft sigh and gently closed her eyes.  Impulsively, Kylo laid a gentle kiss on her forehead.  Rey snapped surprises eyes towards his.  Honestly, he was surprised at his own action, but didn't regret it.

"I'm glad you're okay."

Rey's hazel eyes softened.  "Me too."

"Alright, break it up, lovebirds."  Chewie's amused growl sounded from across the room.

Kylo turned to see him sprawled out comfortably on the couch.  He immediately got annoyed.

"I know you're impatient, but knocking for ten minutes?  That's insane."

Chewie looked at him, frowning.  "Ten minutes?  I was outside your door for less than two minutes before you came charging in on your white horse."  Chewie chuckled at his lame joke.

It was Kylo's turn to be confused-and slightly anxious.  He turned back to Rey who had paled again.

"Well, if it wasn't you, then who was it?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I'm a terrible person! I hope you guys enjoyed it though ;)
> 
> Reylorobin and swtlee made this lovely astetic for this fic and I absolutely adore it!!
> 
> Here's the link if you want to see it:
> 
> http://reylorobyn2011.tumblr.com/post/160514947280/reylorobyn2011-reylo-fic-rec-trust-me-by


	9. Talk to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A gift and a surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like it!! :)

"What's going on?"  Chewie was demanding answers, but Kylo had yet to look away from Rey's pale face.  He was starting to worry that she was going to pass out.

"Rey?"

Her unfocused eyes drifted towards his voice.

"Chewie, I'll talk to you in a second," Kylo threw over his shoulder, not bothering to look.  He stepped closer to Rey, making sure he was close enough to catch her if she did faint.

"Oh.  If you wanted to know, there was a note left on the door," Chewie remarked, miffed at being ignored.

Kylo whipped around to stare incredulously at his infuriating uncle.

"Where is it?" Kylo grit put between his teeth.

Chewie shrugged.  "I put it in the bag."

Kylo stomped over to where Chewie had dumped the bag on the island.  A single, unassuming sheet of lined paper was folded in half on top.  Kylo gingerly picked it up, ignoring everything else inside.  He looked across the room to see Rey, still motionless in her terror.  Kylo hesitated for a moment, wondering if it would be better if he didn't let Rey know the contents of the note.  He rejected the idea almost as soon as it formed.  He knew the consequences of withholding information-he'd lived through it. Kylo cautiously made his way to where Rey was standing, eyeing her unsteady color.  He extended the note out towards her.

"Do you want to read it?"

Rey stared at the note in silence with wide, terror-filled eyes.  After a moment or two of no answer, Kylo slowly withdrew the offered note.

"Is it alright if I read it?"

Rey gave a silent shake of her head that Kylo took as ascent.  His trembling hands unfolded the paper carefully.  Inside were two lines.

_I know where you are._

_You can't hide forever._

Kylo's blood chilled, his face turned ghostly white.  He cleared his threat once, twice, a third time before he could choke the words out.

Chewie's roar of "What's going on?" barely registered in Kylo's mind as he lunged to catch Rey before she hit the ground.  The stress of the situation having reached her, she had slipped into unconsciousness.  Kylo effortlessly swept her up in his arms, holding her limp body close to his heart.  Her pretty, expressive face was drawn and a sickly pale color that was starting to scare him.  Chewie was in an uproar, but Kylo ignored him.

"Get Maz," Kylo whispered, staring down at Rey.

Chewie stopped mid-roar with an intelligent, "Huh?"

"GET MAZ!"

Kylo's shout echoed in the silent apartment.  Guilt laced his stomach, but he ignored it in favor of walking into the bedroom.  In the other room, he heard the front door slam and the automatic lock click into place.  He gently laid Rey down on the unmade bed they shared.  Even her ruby lips had paled in her faint.  Kylo looked down at her with thinly veiled anxiety.  Much as he tried to talk himself out of it, he was coming to care for this girl-a lot more than he was willing to admit.  He brushed her loose hair off her forehead.  She was so beautiful, even in a dead faint.  He checked to make sure she still had a strong pulse.  He pulled the sheets away from her to wrap her in one of the blankets that lay on the ground-Rey was always kicking them off in the middle of the night.  He tucked it all the way under her chin, making sure her entire body was covered.  Satisfied, he leaned over her to place a light kiss on her forehead.

"What's happening, Rey?" he sighed, breathing in her sweet fragrance, "I want to help you, kid, but I have no freaking idea of what's going on.  I wish you would talk to me..."  Kylo's heart broke a little as his voice trailed off.  His sweet Rey was suffering, and there was nothing he could do about it.  He placed one more kiss on her forehead before stepping back.  He pulled up the chair in the corner to keep vigil until Rey woke up or Maz arrived.  Whichever came first.

Kylo watched Rey sleep fitfully for a few minutes before she burst into consciousness, a scream tanked from deep in her chest.  Her eyes flicked around the room in terror.

"Kylo!"

Kulo was quick to grab one of her tiny hands in his, gently engulfing it.  "I'm right here, kid."  He tried to smile, but it came as a forced grimace.

Rey's eyes locked on his, her breathing quick and her grip iron tight on his hand.  Without a word, she climbed into his lap, her head tucked under his chin, his hand clutched tightly in both of hers pulled close to her heart.  Kylo wrapped his other arm around her in give her a slightly awkward squeeze against his chest.  She squeezed his hand in appreciation.  Kylo simply held her in silence before her hesitant voice reached his ears.

"Kylo?"

"Ya, kid?"

She shifted in his lap to look into his eyes.  "I think I need to tell you now."

Kylo took in her tense body language and understood where she was going.  He pulled her back under his chin and began to soothe her stiff back.  "Shh, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, Rey.  If you want to talk, I'll listen, but don't feel like you _owe_ me an explanation.  I'll protect you either way."

Rey sucked in an uneven breath, held it for a long moment, and let it out in a shaky exhale.  "I was five when my parents abandoned me."

Kylo tended beneath her.   _So young..._

"I don't remember much, just a faint promise that they'd come back-someday."  She took another deep breath.  "They left me with Unkar Plutt, the man from the park.  At first, living with him wasn't terrible.  I was fed, sometimes, I had somewhere to sleep with a blanket, and the scary men that came to Unkar's house mostly left me alone.  Plus my parents were going to be back soon."  Rey closed her eyes and tightened her grip on Kylo's hand.  "I kept a tally on the wall of the closet I slept in of everyday that I was there.  It got to the point that I couldn't reach high enough to add another tally and I couldn't fit in the closet.  I was about twelve years old at that point.  That's when things started to get bad.  Unkar started saying that I owed him, because my parents had dumped me on him, but he had done his part in feeding, clothing, and protecting me.  He said he was tired of waiting for someone who was never coming back.  I yelled at him for the first and only time that day," Rey sniffed, "I told him he was stupid, that my parents loved me and they would come back for me.  He only laughed at me.  When I told him I'd never pay him back for things he should do anyways, he got angry.  Very angry."

She paused, reflecting on the past, while Kylo's mind focused on the ugly picture her words were creating.  Kylo was seeing red.  He hated those "parents" who abandoned their baby, _their baby_ , into the hands of that slimy Plutt. It would be too soon if Kylo ever saw that creature again.

"I still have scars from that day."

It was a whisper, but it pierced Kylo straight to his heart.

"What scars?"  Kylo shifted so he was staring straight into Rey's haunted eyes.

She merely turned around and offered Kylo her back.  She inched her shirt up until Kylo could see the bottom of a scar at her left hip that extended across her spine and disappeared under her shirt.

Kylo gently traced the exposed scar reverently.  "Rey..."

She sucked in a breath and kept her back to him.  "Let's just say I learned my _lesson_."

Kylo's whole body ached to comfort her, take away her past, but he couldn't.  This was Rey, and Kylo wanted to know _everything_ , even the hard to hear pieces.

"I started working at his junkyard in Jakku.  I quickly learned what was worthwhile and what was worthless.  If I didn't bring in enough valuable stuff, I didn't eat.  He paid me, and punished me, with food.  There was no way I was going to pay mine _and_ my parent's debt." She turned back to give him doe eyes, dropping her shirt.  "I kept thinking-hoping-they would come back and rescue me, but they didn't.  They _left_ me there like I was _garbage_." Tears started to leak onto her cheeks.  "Unkar was right, I am garbage. No one wants _me_."

Her lips barely formed the words before Kylo gently crushed her to him.

"No, you're not.  You are not _garbage_.  You're not unloveable.  And you sure as heck aren't _unwanted_."  Rey held on to his shirt with tiny fists.  "Chewie wants you, Maz wants you... _I_ want you..." He breathed out quietly.

"Oh, Kylo!"

Kylo's heart broke at her desperate, broken tone.  Her sobbing only got worse, so Kylo held her.  He held her, rocked her, soothed her, and calmed her.  It wasn't a sexual want that grew in Kylo's chest, but a quieter one.  It was warm, content, and protective.  He wanted to hold her close forever.  He wanted to make her laugh and smile.  He wanted to start and end his day with Rey by his side.  He wanted to hold her hand, kiss her forehead, her cheeks, her nose, her lips...

Rey's breathing calmed and her fists relaxed.  She blinked her last tears away, then continued in a hoarse voice.

"Unkar kept all the other men away as I got older.  Not because he wanted to protect me, oh no.  It was because he wanted me all to himself."

Kylo didn't think he could hate the man any more than he already did.  Clearly, he was wrong.

"He kept whispering of how I could pay him back.  I refused him each time.  He threatened me then, telling me that once I was eighteen I would be free game," she shivered in fear and disgust.  Kylo tightened his arms around her.  "The night I turned eighteen, I ran.  I took a single blanket and the clothes on my back.  I never looked back, too afraid of what might be following me.  I was running for a while before I ended up here.  I was so tired and cold.  I hadn't eaten in what felt like months.  I guess I passed out from exhaustion," Rey shrugged.  "Next thing I know, I'm waking up here, in this bed," she gives Kylo a big smile, looping her arms around his neck, "with the nicest, most caring person I've ever met in my life."

Kylo's heart was just about to burst from happiness.  He looked at Rey's swollen hazel eyes and saw the affection and appreciation deep inside them.  Her expression changed for an instant-faster than he could read it-before she leaned in to press a chaste kiss on his cheek.  Kylo's eyes widened as she pulled away, looking up at her in shock and awe.

"Rey..." His whispered response was cut short by the pounding on the front door.  Kylo recognized Chewie's distinctive three knock pattern, but Rey didn't.  Her arms tightened around his neck.  Her chest pressed against his and she buried her face into the side of his neck.  This was a fairly typical reaction for Rey, but after her kiss, it pulled a surprised grunt out of Kylo.

"It's alright, kid.  It's just Chewie."

Her grip relaxed and she pulled away so he could let Chewie and Maz in.  Rey followed right behind him, one hand gripping the hem of his shirt.  Kylo allowed himself a small smile at her clinginess.  He opened the door to see Chewie and Maz with matching concerned expressions on their faces.  Maz bustled back Kylo to wrap her arms around a trembling Rey.  Chewie gave Kylo a stern look and nodded towards the hallway.  Kylo just shook his head and motioned for Chewie to come inside.  Chewie quirked a bushy eyebrow.

Kylo steeled his voice.  "I'm not going to keep any secrets from her."

Chewie gave him a noncommittal grunt.

Kylo looked over at Rey who was staring at him with awe in her eyes.  She extracted herself from Maz's arms to throw her arms around his neck.  Kylo hunched over so Rey didn't have to stand on her tippy-toes and wrapped his arms around her waist.  She pressed her face against the side of his neck, nuzzling into him for a second then pulled away to whisper "thank you" into one of Kylo's ears.  Kylo could feel his face and ears burn from the force of his blush.  She placed a small kiss on his ear before pulling back, a light blush dusting the tops of her cheeks.  Kylo only had eyes for her, even though the heat from his blush was enough to power a thousand suns.  Maz's laugh broke through Kylo's and Rey's little bubble.  Rey blushed harder and scurried to Kylo's side.  Kylo snuck glances between his feet, Rey's embarrassed face, and Maz's amused one.

"Well, aren't you going to tell me what made Chewie drag me away from my knitting?"  Maz stared accusingly at Kylo.

Kylo snorted.  Maz had never knitted in her life.

"Well, someone was trying to get into the apartment while I was at work," he handed Maz the paper.  "They left a note."

Maz read the note and hummed thoughtfully.  "Seems like you're trouble, missy."  Rey stiffened by Kylo's side.  Maz gave her a small smile and Kylo felt her relax.  "Well Kylo Ren.  What do you want us to do?"

He looked at Maz with his usual awe at her ability to take on impossible challenges without blinking an eye.  He chanced one more glance at Rey before he answered.

"I'm not sure.  I don't like that this person knows where we live and I don't want to leave Rey by herself.  I could see if I could take a vacation from work, but with Snoke..."  He trailed off regretfully.

"No, no, you're right.  Maybe Rey can spend a few days with us?  We have a spare bedroom and plenty of food," Maz trailed off as Rey planted herself Kylo and held onto one of his arms.

Kylo looked down at her panicked expression in alarm.

"We'll talk about it tonight.  For tomorrow, I think I'll just call in sick and stay home.  We'll let you know what we decide."

He heard Rey let out a small sigh of relief.

For the next few hours Kylo, Chewie, and Maz talked about nothing, each deep in thought of the trouble Rey was apparently in.  Rey stayed quiet, sticking to Kylo like a second skin.  Soon Maz and Chewie excused themselves.  Kylo followed them to the door, Rey trailing behind him.

"Call us if anything happens, okay, kid?"

Kylo smiled up at Chewie's concerned face.  "Of course."

Chewie turned to Rey.  "You'll be safe with Kylo.  I promise."

With that, they left.

Kylo felt as though he was going to cry at Chewie's confidence in him.  Rey was clinging to his arm as the door shut behind Maz and Chewie.  With everything that happened, it was almost time for bed.

"You hungry, kid?"

Rey shook her head.

Kylo frowned.  "You need to eat something.  Come on," he lead Rey into one of the island chairs and started to make some toast.  "Do you want to change into something more comfortable?  I know I'm heading to bed soon."

Rey shrugged.

Her lack of emotion was starting to worrying kylo.  They waited in silence for their toast to finish.  They are quietly, too.  Once Kylo pulled out his pjs after dinner, Rey spoke.

"When I... called you..."

She paused, making Kylo look at her.  She was staring at the sheets she was wringing between her hands.

"Ya?"  Kylo had no idea where this conversation was going.

"Well, before you hung up, you kinda said... You said," she shut her eyes and forced out the next words breathlessly.  "Yousaidyoulovedme."

Kylo's brow furrowed.  "What?"

"You said you loved me," Rey mumbled to her hands.

Kylo froze.  He had.  He had told her he loved her.  It was thoughtless, but it was true.  Probably truer than she wanted it to be.  Kylo held his breath in anticipation of what she was going to say next.

She mumbled something he couldn't hear.

Kylo slowly made his way closer, so he was sitting on the opposite side of the bed.

"What was that?"

"Did you mean it?"

Her voice was breathless as see looked at him with wide and trusting eyes, and she was looking at _him_ like that.

"Do you want me to?"  Kylo could barely hear his own whisper.  His heart stopped in his chest as he took in Rey's reaction to his admission.  Her breathing was ragged and her pulse jumped at the base of her throat.  Her eyes jumped between his, searching his earnest expression.

 _What if she said no?_  The dark voice at the back of Kylo's mind yelled.

 _What if she said yes?_  The quiet, hopeful voice whispered to his heart.

"You don't have to answer, Rey," Kylo whispered, dropping his gaze to her death grip on the bed covers.  "Go to sleep."  He leaned in and pecked Rey's cheek, and disappeared into the bathroom.

_What in the world am I doing?!_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you see any mistakes!!
> 
> Thank you everyone who has read and kudoed or commented!! You guys are the bomb!!
> 
> I just had to get this out here as fast as possible!! My muse is now in full swing people!! Trying to take full advantage of it! The next chapter is in the works right now!


	10. Shopping, Scampi, and She's The Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title says it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry this took a while to get out! I couldn't figure out the ending, but I hope I did it justice! Enjoy!!

Kylo left the bathroom only after he was sure Rey was asleep.  He snuck into the dark room and silently slipped between the covers, careful not to jostle Rey.

"Kylo?"

Kylo cursed his luck.  Of course she wasn't asleep.

"Ya?"

Kylo felt her scoot closer to him.

"Can you hold me?  Just for tonight?"

Kylo sucked in a surprised breath.  Though they had shared this bed for weeks, they mostly stayed on their own sides, occasionally waking up to find they had entangled themselves in the night.  He flipped onto his side to face Rey in the darkness.  He could barely make out her outline in the little moonlight coming from the window.

"If that's what you want," Kylo whispered.

Kylo could hear her move as she flipped onto her side so she was facing away from Kylo.  She then scooted so her back was against his chest.  Kylo looped one of his arms loosely around her waist and bent his knees behind hers, effectively spooning her.

"Is this okay?" Kylo whispered into her ear.

She shivered against him.  "Perfect."

Her whispered answer sent warmth straight to his heart.  He quickly fell asleep with a smile on his face and Rey in his arms.

***

_"Ben?"_

_Rey was standing nervously in the kitchen when Kylo got back from work.  Her hesitant look immediately set Kylo on edge._

_"What is it, kid?  Are you alright?"_

_Kylo walked over to wrap her up in his arms.  That was one thing he could still count on-she still melted into him every time he held her._

_"Benny!  There's something I have to tell you!"  Rey's squished voice was adorable and Kylo had to squeeze her, just once, before he let her go._

_"What is it?"_

_Rey smiled at him timidly.  She reached into her back pocket and held out a white stick to him._

_"Rey..." Kylo breathed, "Is this?"_

_Rey grinned and nodded as her eyes filled up with tears.  "We're gonna have a baby."_

_Kylo felt his own eyes start to overflow as he spun Rey around the apartment yelling, "WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY!  WE'RE GONNA BE PARENTS!"_

_Rey's laughter joined Kylo's chant as she hung on for dear life._

_"Benny!  Put me down, you silly!"_

_Kylo slowly eased her down as he whispered, "We're gonna have a baby..."_

_Rey beamed at his awed expression.  "We are, Benny boy! You're gonna be a daddy!"_

_"And you're going to be a mother," Rey's smile widened.  "We're gonna be a family."_

_Rey's tear spilled over at his words._

_Looking at his beautiful wife, who was now carrying their baby, Kylo couldn't help himself any longer.  He leaned down and kissed her, right on her cherry lips.  She tastes sweet, like sunshine, and Kylo could think of nothing better than this as Rey dug her fingers into his hair to pull him even deeper into their kiss._

"Kylo?"

Kylo grunted at the intrusion to his dreams.  He snuggles his pillow closer to his chest, determined to block everything out and go back to his dream.  His pillow squeaked and swatted his arm.  Kylo's eyes flew open to see that his pillow was actually Rey looking very squished and very red.  He immediately released her from his death grip.

"I'm so sorry, Rey!"

Rey's face and neck were tomato red as she waved off Kylo's apology to go into the bathroom.  Kylo flopped back into the covers as the bathroom door clicked shut.  He groaned and rubbed his eyes.  He had no idea where he stood when it came to Rey.  He wanted to push Rey for answers.  He _wanted_ to be allowed to love her.  But he wouldn't.  He could be patient.  Sometimes.

***

Rey was helping Kylo clean up the breakfast dishes when the idea hit him.  It almost made him drop the plate he was putting into the dishwasher.  It was perfect.

"You know, we're kinda running out of things to eat."  It was mostly true.  Rey turned to look at him with a question in her eyes.  Kylo smiled at her.  "We could go grocery shopping together, if you wanted."

Rey looked at the ground and trailed her eyes around the room. She took a deep breath and gave him a small smile.

"Okay."

Her trust was shining in her eyes. Her trust in _him_.  Kylo nearly burst with happiness because of it.  Kylo reached out his hand, letting it dangle in the space between them.  Rey raised her hand slowly, their palms sliding against each other as she slipped her slender fingers in between his.  They both smiled at each other as light blushes rose on their cheeks.

"Let's go then."

Kylo pulled Rey out the door, stopping only to grab his keys, keeping hold of Rey's hand like it was a precious gift-which it was.  And it meant more after everything Rey had told him.  His poor Rey hurting for all those years.  Of course she held on to hope that someone would come back for her-that was who she was.  Kylo almost felt guilty that he hadn't taken her in earlier, despite knowing it was impossible.  Now, he just wanted to hold her close and never leave her side is she'd let him.  Maybe, just maybe, he could help her not hurt so much.

He glanced over to see Rey was already beaming up at him.  Once he caught her staring up at him, she blushed and looked away.  Kylo squeezed her hand, chest puffed out in pride as he opened Rey's door for her.  She gave him a sweet smile as she brushed past him and allowed him to close her in.  Kylo jogged around the front of the car to settle in the drivers seat, gave Rey a grin, and shifted the car into gear.  Rey switched the radio on to her favorite station and started singing.  Kylo smiled to himself, enjoying her sweet voice.  They arrived at the grocery store where Kylo found a parking spot in the half-empty lot.  Kylo turned off the car and jogged to get Rey's door for her.  She smiled at him and accepted the hand he offered her.  Kylo's heart flip-flopped in his chest.

_"Remember, Benny.  You should treat every girl like a lady.  No exceptions.  The world needs more gentlemen like you. "_

His mother's voice rang in his ears and he was eight years old again, opening his mother's car door for her.  The memory that usually brought a dark sadness, only brought a bittersweet melancholy.

Rey gently tugged on his arm gazing up at him happily.  Kylo returned her smile.  He allowed her to pull him into the store.

It wasn't a large store.  There was the usual foodstuff.  A bakery at one end where the bread tasted exactly like the doughnuts.  Fruits and vegetables on the other end where most of the produce was old or picked over.  The same toys that had been there for the last ten years.

Kylo saw Rey take everything in with a child-like wonder.  Kylo had to remind himself that she  _was_ a child.  The thought sombered him enough to grab a car and lead Rey to the produce section first.

"What fruit do you like, kid?"

Rey was running one finger over the selection of apples.  She gently admired each one before murmuring, "I'm not sure."

Kylo smiled through one of the many heartbreaks she gave him.

"That's okay.  We can get anything you want to try."

Rey spun towards him.  "Do you mean it?  Anything?"

"Of course."

Rey flung herself into his arms.  "Thank you, thank you, thank you!  You are the best!"

Kylo was too slow to return her embrace before she was off to decide what she wanted to try.  Kylo chuckled and enthusiasm and followed her as she chose cherries, pomegranate, grapes, apples, pineapple, oranges, brussell sprouts, broccoli, cauliflower, cucumbers, lettuce, and anything else that caught her fancy.  Rey lead Kylo away from the produce, browsing the store until one isle caught her attention.  She froze in the middle of the path, mouth wide in a silent gasp.  She turned to give Kylo one of the happiest looks he had ever seen on her face.  Kylo grinned back and beckoned her to lead their overflowing cart to whatever had caught her attention so thoroughly.  Rey reverently walked down the isle full of markers, colored pencils, and bright colored paper.  She stopped in front of the own display, one hand reaching out to brush a packet of coloured pens.

"I've wanted these pens since forever.  My very own pens..."

She didn't turn to face him, but Kylo could hear the longing in her voice.  Without another thought, he reached around her to grab the packet of pens she was admiring, dropping them into their cart.

"Now you have pens, but shouldn't you have something to use them with?". Kylo motioned to where the journals and notebooks were.

Rey's eyes filled with tears as she gave him a strangled laugh and a not, gazing up at him with undisguised warmth.  She walked to the journals and began a careful perusal of each.  Some of the options were comical.  Covered in stupid phrases and children's carton characters in garish colors.  Rey's hand stopped as she reached a simple green journal with a lighter green pine tree in the center.  She curled her hands reverently around it and hugged it to her chest.

Kylo smiled at her choice.  It fit her.  He lead them to the front to make there purchases.  Rey helped Kylo load bag after bag of food into the car, but chose to take her pens and journal to her seat with her.  It was such a small thing, but it seemed to be everything to Rey.  It broke Kylo's heart at the same time it warmed because  _he_ could give her that happiness.

Rey hummed along to the radio as Kylo brought them home.  They brought the groceries up in two ttrips.  Kylo started making them sandwiches after everything has been put away.  Rey sat in the living room admiring her pens.  Kylo looked fondly at her as she drew a single line with each one before putting it away and doing the same with the next one.  It made Kylo smile, the care she took with each pen, as though they were made of glass.

"Do you like your pens?"

"Do I like my pens?" Rey gave him an incredulous look.  "They are the most amazing things that I own.  I don't want to waste them."

"If you run out, we can always get you more, no worries." Kylo smiled.  "What are you going to use your journal for?"

Rey blushed and ignored his question and raised eyebrow as she started silent.

"Alright...  I have to get dinner started for tonight, I guess." He gave Rey a sky smirk, "It's going to be special."

Rey just nodded, not looking up from her journal.

***

_This was it._

Rey had moved into the bedroom an hour ago, presumably for more privacy for whatever she was working on in her journal.  The table was set with the best glasses, plates, and silverware in his kitchen.  Two mismatched candles were lit in the center of the table and the lights turned down low.  The scampi he had slaved over was perfect.  Spices floated in the air, making his mouth water.  Kylo readjusted the napkin and silverware for the hundredth time.  Taking a steeling breath, he walked towards the bedroom door.  He peeked in to see Rey dozing in the center of the bed, his pillow tucked under her cheek.  Kylo cleared his throat.  Rey blinked awake and gave him a lazy smile that squeezed his heart.  He returned her smile before scuffling his feet on the carpet.

"What's up?" Rey's sleepy voice pulled Kylo's gaze from the floor.

"Well, uh, I was thinking, you see.  And, well, would you like to have dinner with me?"

"We have dinner together every night?"

Kylo cringed at his own wording.  "No, I mean, like a dinner date.  Like, I want to take you on a date.  Right now.  If you want."

Rey's blush was obvious to Kylo from across the room.  Kylo's own cheeks and ears burned three degrees hotter than the sun.

"Oh."

Kylo's hope died a little at her monosymbolic response.  And it wasn't a yes.

"It's okay if you don't want to, kid."

Rey bolted upright.  "No!  No, I want to go on a date with you!"

"Really?" Kylo grinned at her.

"Really," she grinned back.

"Great, because it's all ready for us, I just have to change."

"What?" Rey gave him a confused look.  "Why do you have to change for dinner?"

Kylo blushed.  "Well, it's a date so I want to look, you know, nicer."

"But you always look nice." Rey was still giving him a confused look.

Kylo blushed even harder and could barely stammer out a thank you.  Rey blushed too when she heard Kylo's muttered appreciation.

"So, you're going to dress nice because it's special?"

"Yes!  Exactly!" Kylo smiled through his blush.  "It's very special, so I'm going to dress special."

Rey's eyes twinkled in understanding.  "Oh!"

Kylo nodded, too embarrassed to say anything else.  He walked into the closet and started going through his nicer shirts.  He decided against black-which was most of my closet-and went with a short sleeved navy blue button-up and the only pair of blue jeans he owned.  He avoided Rey's eyes as he went to change in bathroom.  He switched from his usual all black ensemble to the new outfit he had picked.  He examined the effect in the mirror.  His eyes looked lighter when they weren't surrounded by black.  He was pleasantly surprised by the effect.  He brushed his teeth once more and with a quick adjustment of his hair, he was confident enough to come out.

Rey stood on the other side of the door, a bundle of clothes behind her back, mouth open in a gasp of shock.  She looked him up and down with wide eyes.  Kylo nervously shuffled his bare feet.

"Wow," Rey breathed.

Kylo blushed hard enough that he swore Rey could feel the great of it radiating off of him.  He smiled at her.

"Thanks, I think."

Rey gulped and nodded, not looking away from him.

"Well, I guess I'll, you know, get the food out and... stuff..."

Rey snapped her mouth closed, dropped her gaze and let Kylo pass her.  She scurried info the bathroom as soon as he moved out of the way.  Kylo smiled at the closed door, deciding that this was going to be one of his favorite memories-after he got rid of the embarrassment, of course.

Fifteen minutes later, Rey was still in the bathroom.  Kylo was starting to get worried.

_Should I see if she's okay?  What if she hurt herself?_

His thoughts stopped mid-panic.  He felt like he has been hit by a truck.  His breath wheezed though his lungs.  He could barely form a thought, let alone a word.  Coming through his bedroom door was the most glorious creature he had ever seen.  Her hair flowed in soft curls around her cheeks.  Her hazel eyes were lightly emphasized by the little make-up she had added.  Her lips were painted bright red and pulled up into a smirk at his reaction.  He was floored by her and he hadn't even looked below her chin.

Kylo made his way across the room, not sure what he was going to do, just knowing he needed to be close to get.  Rey's smirk grew into a broad grin as he got closer.

"Wow."

He could only repeat Rey's earlier sentiment.  It was the only thing he could force out of his mouth.

Rey grinned even bigger at his loss of words.  She gave him a cheeky wink which caused Kylo to smirk, the spell broken.  He placed one hand on the small of her back and lead her to the chair he had pulled out for her.  She had chosen a black dress that showed off her tan skin perfectly.  Kylo smiled to himself.  He enjoyed seeing her dressed in black-it was his favorite color afterall.

So, what are we eating?" Rey looked expectantly at him from across the table 

"Shrimp scampi?" Kylo's voice squeaked like a twelve year old boys.  He cleared his throat through his embarrassment and Rey's chuckles.  "Shrimp scampi.  I think you'll like it."

Rey have him her signature set smile and let him dish her up.  He has cut up some apples and rinsed off some of the cherries she had picked out.  A cucumber broccoli salad sat in between them.  They ate with warm conversation between them, enjoying the food and company.  They teased each other as they cleaned up the excess food.  For the first time his apartment was full of laughter.  Rey tossed her hair over one shoulder as she gave him a saucey grin.  Get lipstick was smeared on one side and she had a piece of broccoli of all things such in her hair, but Kylo couldn't think of a time where she looked better than she did at this moment.

"Can we watch a movie?" Rey gave him puppy dog eyes.

"Of course we can.  We  _are_ still on a date," Kylo winked at her.

Her blush almost matched the shade of lipstick she had on.  They made their way to the couch to decide on what movie to watch.

"I figured out how to record movies, so I recorded a bunch, if that's okay?"

Kylo smiled at her apprehension.  "You are welcome to anything in this apartment."

Rey grinned at him and excitedly pointed out the movie she wanted to watch.  Kylo smiled at her innocent choice, sad to admit that he had watched it himself once or twice.  They settled back against the couch as the opening credits rolled in.  The upbeat music in the background delighted Rey to no end.  Kylo hesitantly reached an arm around the back of Rey's seat as Viola decided to join the boy's soccer team.  Rey snuggled into his side without taking her eyes off the screen.  Kylo normally enjoyed this show, but he couldn't help but watch Rey as she laughed to all the funny parts and gasped at the action.  She was adorable and Kylo didn't want to be anywhere else.

Duke was walking out of the trees when Rey sighed, one hand over her heart.  "I want that to happen to me."

"What?" Kylo asked in disbelief.  "Some guy to ignore you once you tell them something important and then randomly show up again, just because he felt like it?"

Rey glared at him.  "No.  I want a guy willing to make the small romantic gestures.  Like show up in a garden I'm in.  Or remember that I like cheese.  Or even listen to me when I complain.  Everyone's worried about the big romantic gestures.  I prefer the small ones."

Kylo satdumbfounded, his mouth agape.  His little Rey was a hopeless romantic.  She smiled at him and he immediately smiled back.

After the movie ended they got ready for bed, each taking a turn in the bathroom.  Rey finished after him and smiled as he stood up from the bed.  He walked over and opened his arms.  She leaned into him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Thank you for going on a date with me.  I had lots of fun."

Rey giggled against his chest.  "Thank you for making dinner."

Kylo smiled and leaned down to place a kiss on her cheek.  At the same time, Rey leaned her head to the side to give his cheek a kiss.  Their lips met in an awkward kiss that neither of them were expecting.  Rey jumped back out of his arms and stared wide eyed into his face.  Kylo was sure his expression matched her own shocked one.  Before he could apologize or day anything, Rey raced into the bathroom and locked the for behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so long!!
> 
> I just want to say thank you to everyone for their support. Without you, this story would not exist.
> 
> You're comment give me life!! Love you all <3


	11. Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY!! That's all that I can say ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long y'all! I'll explain more at the end!
> 
> But thank you so so so so SO much for y'all's continued support! This fic would not have continued without y'all! :)

Kylo reached up and touched where Rey’s lips had been. It had been accidental, but Kylo wished with every fiber of his being that it had been real. That he could kiss her like he wanted, regardless of age and troubles befalling her.

 

He sighed and walked to the locked bathroom door. He knocked twice lightly and whispered, “Rey?”

 

He heard some shifting in the bathroom.

 

“I'm sorry, kid. I didn't mean to scare you off. It was an accident…”

 

Rey remained silent.

 

Kylo sighed again and leaned his forehead against the door.

 

“I had a really great day and I don't want this to ruin it.” He paused. “Can you come out?”

 

He heard the lock click open. He stepped away from the door as Rey opened it. She still looked shell-shocked, and Kylo couldn't blame her for that.

 

“Did you want to kiss me?”

 

Rey’s voice was quiet and very small as she refused to look at him.

 

Kylo’s brows furrowed.

 

“Rey…”

 

She held up one small hand to silence him.

 

“No apologies, no excuses. Did you want to kiss me?”

 

Rey’s eyes burned with fire as she stared him down. Kylo dropped his eyes to the floor.

 

“Yes,” he said weakly,not understanding what was happening.

 

“Then kiss me.”

 

Kylo’s eyes snapped up to hers. She was standing tall with her awkward confidence. Kylo was speechless. He didn't know what to say or do. The longer he stayed quiet and motionless,the more restless Rey became. Her shoulders and head dropped and she looked at the ground between them.

 

“Can you? Kiss me, I mean?” She nervously shifted from side to side. “I'd really like to kiss you…”

 

That was all he needed to hear. He closed the distance between them in two semi-confident strides.

 

“Are you sure you want this?”

 

“More than anything.”

 

Grey’s breathless confession nearly undid him. He gently reached out with one hand to brush a strand of hair out of her face and behind her ear. He kept his hand there and cupped her cheek. Rey nuzzled into his palm and let out a relieved sigh. Kylo smiled softly at her and brought his other hand up to cup her other cheek. Holding her face between his hands like she was made of glass, Kylo leaned down and pressed a small kiss to her forehead. Rey’s eyes fluttered closed. Kylo pulled back to press a small kiss to each of her cheeks. Rey let out a breathless giggle as he kissed the tip of her nose. He then pressed the tiniest of kisses to her eyelids. Rey’s nose scrunched up.

 

“Quit stalling,” she breathed.

 

“I'm not,” Kylo whispered into one of her ears. “Relax.”

 

Kylo felt the tension leave her body. He pressed a single kiss to her ear and pulled back so they could be face to face. He leaned in close enough that their noses touched. Kylo breathed in her unique scent and ran the tip of his nose along the line of hers. His eyelids lowered so he could barely see beneath his eyelashes. He tilted his head just enough that he could reach her lips easily. He hunched over and leaned in. Breathing in Rey’s nervous breath,he placed a single kiss onto her cherry lips. A shock ran through him at the gentle touch. Rey gasped and grabbed hold of his wrists, pulling him closer to her.

 

Kylo had kissed women before, had women kiss  _ him  _ before, but it was never like this.

 

Kylo pulled away just a breath and reangled his head to a more comfortable position. He pressed his lips firmly against hers this time. This was a kiss he could lost in--his hands on her cheeks, her hands around his wrists. There was no going back, not when the hesitant movement of Rey’s lips against his own caused everything else to fall away. He was almost certain he was dreaming.

 

He felt the urge to pull her in even closer, so he lessened the kiss, pecked her once more. Closing his eyes and panting slightly, he rested his forehead against hers.

 

“Wow,” Rey breathed across his lips, causing him to chuckle. “Are kisses always like that?”

 

Kylo pulled back far enough so that he could look into her eyes.

 

“Never. Never for me,” he murmured.

 

Rey beamed up at him. Kylo felt his own lips pull up in an answering smile. She grabbed one of his hands off her face and tugged him to the bed. Kylo let his other hand drop and willingly followed. They sat down side by side, smiling softly at each other.

 

“You know,” Rey whispered conspiringly, “that was my first kiss.”

 

Kylo grinned, unrealistically proud of the fact.

 

“And how was it?”

 

Rey shrugged, her eyes glittering with mischief. “It was alright.”

 

“Alright?” Kylo smirked. “Only alright?”

 

Rey shrugged again. “I have nothing to compare it to.”

 

“Oh, I see,” Kylo drawled. “You’re just trying to get me to kiss you again.”

 

Rey shot him a cheeky smile.

 

“Is it working?”

 

Kylo barked out a laugh as Rey descended into giggles. Kylo reached up and traced one finger over the curve of her cheek. She snagged his wrist before he could drop it and kissed the tip of his finger. She blushed a deep red at her own boldness. Kylo could feel his own face heat up. Rey’s eyes were fixed on his own as he leaned in closer. She held her breath as Kylo dropped his gaze to her ruby lips. Gently, he pressed his own lips to hers in a feather-light peck. Rey let out a breathless sigh.

 

“Goodnight, Rey,” Kylo grinned cheekily at her.

 

Rey pouted her lips.

 

“But Kylo!”

 

Kylo let out a small chuckle as he tucked her head under his chin.

 

“We need rest. We still have a full day of decisions ahead of us tomorrow.”

 

Rey sighed, her breath tickling his neck. “You’re right…”

 

“I usually am.”

 

Kylo’s self-satisfied tone and smirk was enough to earn him a slap against his chest from Rey as he laughed.

 

_ “Goodnight, Kylo.” _

 

Kylo pressed a quick kiss against the top of her head.

 

“Goodnight, kid”

 

***

 

Kylo woke up with his arms empty and cold. His blurry eyes struggled to take in the empty bed. He shot up, ignoring the painful head-rush that resulted, and ran into the living area of their apartment. It was still dark, with hardly any moonlight to light his path and the objects around him. His eyes flashed around the room, his heart pounding in his chest with fear.

 

_ What happened to her? Was she hurt? Did that toad find her? _

 

Kylo’s panic built as he skidded around the empty apartment.

 

“Rey?”

 

His voice was hoarse from disuse. The dull wind that blew against his windows was the only response he received. His heart stopped beating as he felt a ton of bricks slam into his chest.

 

_ She left me. _

 

It was the only thought running through his head.

 

Just when he fell for her and she was starting to open up to him, she left.

 

This was it.

 

All he was left with was a slowly fading memory of the joy she brought into his life.

 

Kylo couldn’t handle the pain anymore and let out an unearthly scream as he destroyed every bit of the furniture that reminded him of her--which was everything. The pain in his chest lessened as he turned it into rage as he destroyed the apartment.

 

_ Her smile. _

 

_ Her laugh. _

 

_ Her eyes. _

 

_ Her lips… _

 

Kylo let out another shattering scream as tears slipped out of his eyes, streaming down his cheeks in long streaks.

 

A stinging slap across his cheek brought him back to his senses.

 

He ripped himself out of the confines of the sheets wrapped around his legs. Rey was standing by the side of the bed, staring at him wide eyed.

 

Kylo let out a choking sob from the back of his throat.

 

“Rey…” His voice was thick with sleep and tears.

 

He reached his arms out towards her, almost begging her to climb into them. When she stood stock still, Kylo realized that something was wrong. His mind was still sluggish from his nightmare, and clouded with the relief of seeing Rey safe and in their apartment.

 

When he gained more control of himself, he asked in a timid voice, “Rey? What’s wrong?” He gulped. “Did I… Did I do something wrong?”

 

“Kylo.” Rey’s eyes were huge and filled with fear, but also with concern.  “Kylo you were yelling things in your sleep. You…” She paused for a moment, collecting herself. “You kept calling my name and asking why everyone leaves you… Why I would leave you…”

 

Kylo was mortified that she had heard his deepest secrets, and terrified that she would leave him. Or worse, feel like she could never leave him.

 

“Rey... “

 

“Yes?”

 

Kylo breathed out heavily from his nose. “My dad never came to see me after my mother died. I haven’t seen him since I was in high school. I still have no idea where he is. I’m sure Chewie does, but he doesn’t want to see me anymore.”

 

Rey made an indignant sound. “Why not? You should always want to see your son!”

 

Kylo gave her a sliver of a smile, which came out as more of a grimace. “I reminded him too much of my mom. He couldn’t handle seeing her in me.” Kylo paused. “She was the light of his life, and when she was gone, so was he.”

 

Rey’s eyes were filling up with tears. She held out one hand to him, which he clung to like a lifeline.

 

“My nightmares end up focusing on being abandoned by the people I… The people who are important to me.” He felt Rey give his hand a reassuring squeeze. “You left me in this dream. You just… disappeared. One moment you were there, the next...” Kylo made a vague gesture with the one hand not in Rey’s.

 

“Kylo…”

 

Kylo could feel the weight behind the next words Rey was going to say. But he couldn’t let her say them.

 

“Shh,” Kylo cut her off, “You’re here now and that’s all that matters. We should really get to sleep. Goodnight, kid,”

 

Kylo shifted so that his back was facing Rey. He knew he was being brisk and he didn’t like talking to her like that, but his emotions were too much for him to handle appropriately in front of her.

 

Eventually, he felt the mattress dip as Rey climbed in behind him. Kylo closed his eyes and deepened his breathing, hoping she would think he was asleep.

 

As he was drifting away, he thought he heard her say. “Don’t be afraid. I won’t leave you.” Before he was carried away into nicer dreams of sunshine and trees.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I took such a long break, but a tiny bit of background:
> 
> I was serving in my church for a while, before I was blindsided with depression and anxiety. My depression at this point, is under control, but my anxiety is still in flux. None of my family had experienced this before and it was the hardest time in my life. Some days, I can't even function. I panic when I think about letting y'all down and my family down.
> 
> I have support, but this fic has become an outlet for me. So if becomes too dark PLEASE let me know! I don't want to take away anything from this!
> 
> Also, The Last Jedi, am I right?? THAT SPARKED MY INSPIRATION ONCE AGAIN! I'M SO HAPPY ABOUT THAT!
> 
> As always, y'alls comments give me life, and if there's anything y'all would like me to add to this fic, let me know! I love y'alls ideas! They really help!!
> 
> Thanks for listening to my rant!
> 
> Love y'all!


	12. Break Time is Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we go again!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry yall! I hope yall like it! Its very rough, but I hope yall like it! Yall deserve this for sticking with me for so long!

Kylo woke up a few hours later, still tense about the conversation that needed to happen between the two of them.  This wasn’t something they could ignore and forget it ever happened. Something had changed last night. Something that Kylo wasn’t sure he was ready to face.

 

He slowly eased himself up to see Rey fast asleep on the opposite side of the bed. Kylo sighed and carefully made his way into the kitchen. He filled a cup full of water and drained it in one drink. He braced his arms on either side of the sink and let his head drop to his chest.

 

His chest was tight and aching. His hands were shaking and he felt off balance. Thoughts circled endlessly around his mind. He felt as though he would throw up.

 

Kylo squeezed his eyes shut and forced his mind into a different train of thought. In fact, he stopped thinking at all. His mind shut down as he pictured peaceful nothingness. His frayed nerves slowly settled down. He was able to take deep breaths and focus on the feel of the countertop underneath his fingertips.

 

Small hands traced the tight muscles in his back. Not a word was spoken as Rey continued to rub his rigid back. After a few minutes, Kylo relaxed into her gentle touch. Her hands slowly made their way around his ribcage as she wrapped her arms around him from behind, her cheek pressed against his back. They stayed in that position, listening and feeling each other breathe, until Kylo let out a long breath. Rey’s arms tightened around him before letting him go and allowing him to turn around to face her.

 

“Rey?” Kylo croaked out.

 

She looked up him with warm, open eyes, allowing him to talk at his own pace.

 

“Rey?” His uncertainty made her name into a question. “I think we need to talk about a few things.”

 

She just nodded at him and lead him to the couch in the living room. They sat down facing one another.

 

Kylo took another deep breath and blurted, “You should probably go with Chewie and Maz.”

 

Rey reared back, looking hurt.

 

“What?! No! I’m not going to leave you!” She nearly yelled in his face.

 

“Rey..”

 

“No! No, now it’s time that you listen to me, alright?” She angrily shoved a finger close to his face. “I don’t have anyone. I’m nothing. No one,” she pressed on as Kylo made a move to say something, “But  _ you.  _ You make me feel like _ something. Someone.  _ I’m not ready to give up on you. I know you’re afraid, and I am too, but I’m staying by your side, okay?” Rey was nearly growling at him as she finished her speech. “How does that sound for a decision?”

 

Kylo’s eyes misted over and he nearly let the tears fall as he stared at the determine set of her jaw and eyes.

 

_ She’s fighting for me. _

 

Kylo couldn’t remember anyone outside of Chewie and Maz who had ever fought on his side. His heart ached as Rey glared at him. He let out a choked cough, before pulling Rey into his arms, gripping her tightly, as if afraid she’d be gone when he let go.

 

“Kylo!” Rey squeaked against his chest.

 

She allowed him to pull her closer and he silently let his tears fall gently into her hair.

 

Kylo hummed with contentment through his tears. She was here, in his arms. He realized in that moment that this was all he needed to feel okay. All he needed was his little mystery girl to stay here in his arms, and everything would be okay.

 

“I love you.”

 

It came out softly broken. A tremble of sound. The terrifying truth.

 

Rey stiffened in his arms, but didn’t pull away.

 

Kylo was frozen as well. He hadn’t planned on telling her. He hadn’t planned on her knowing.

 

_ What did I do? _

 

“Kylo?” She breathed against his chest.

 

Kylo could barely hear her over the sound of his own racing heart.

 

“Do you mean it?”

 

Kylo could feel dampness start to soak into his shirt.

 

“Do you really love… Can you really love a nobody?” Rey’s voice cracked with emotion.

 

“Oh, Rey. My precious mystery. I have loved you since I found you outside of my apartment in the freezing rain, covered in cloth. And you are  _ not  _ a nobody.”

 

Kylo gripped Rey’s shoulders and waited until her eyes met his. Her perfect hazel eyes were still red and leaking, but they were the most glorious thing Kylo had ever seen.

 

“You are Rey. You are strong. You are beautiful.” Kylo took a deep breath, forcing the next words out. “And I am all yours.”

 

Rey burst into sobs as she threw her arms around Kylo’s neck, nearly squeezing the breath right out of him. His arms reflexively wrapped around her waist to bring her even closer.

 

“You’re mine! You’re mine!” Rey cried into his neck, pressing light kisses everywhere she could reach. “Kylo, Kylo, Kylo,” her breathless joy was painted into each syllable of his name.

 

“Oh, Rey. I’ve waited for so long. I feel like I’ve waited a lifetime for you.” Kylo whispered into her hair.

 

Rey stilled and pulled away far enough that she could look into Kylo’s eyes.

 

She didn’t say anything, but her eyes showed Kylo everything he needed to know.

 

_ She loved him too. _

 

***

 

After a few minutes, or hours, of contently holding each other, Kylo heard Rey’s stomach growl.

 

Rey giggled as Kylo smiled fondly down at her.

 

“Food?”

 

“Yes, please!”

 

Kylo grinned at her child-like enthusiasm, pulled her into his chest, and placed a kiss to the top of her head. Rey giggled and slapped his chest to roll out of his grasp and went to the kitchen. Kylo chuckled and heaved himself up to follow her.

 

His thoughts were full of Rey. Her voice. Her smile. Her scent. Her everything. She was his everything.

 

“Do you want pancakes?”

 

They were his favorite after all.

 

No answer.

 

“Rey?”

 

Kylo walked around the corner.

 

Nothing.

 

No one was there.

 

Gone.

 

Missing.

 

Alone.

 

“ REY?!”

There was nothing but the bang of his front door swinging against the wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank yall so much! I don't know what I'd do without yall, honestly! Yall are the best!!


	13. Twists and Turns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprise after suprise after surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it took so long! I hope y'all like it :)

Kylo wasted no time in sprinting out the door and into the street. His mind was cloudy and he saw only one option.

 

He had to get Rey.

 

The street was deserted and Kylo cursed under his breath. He forgot to put on shoes before he was in the street.

 

Kylo sprinted back upstairs and threw on the closest sneakers and as a last thought, grabbed his cell phone. He ran back down and scanned the street. He couldn’t see anything that indicated where Rey and her capture had gone. And he knew deep in his soul, that Rey didn’t leave him because she wanted to. She had to have been taken by someone, _had_ to. No matter what his doubts said, he had to hold onto that fact.

 

The moment he thought of giving up, he heard a faint, “ _Kylo!_ ” that was swiftly silenced.

 

Kylo spun in the direction he thought her voice was coming from and took off running, hoping against hope that he wouldn’t be too late. That he could get to her. That it wasn’t going to end up the same as his…

 

He shook his head. He couldn’t think like that now. He had to focus for Rey.

 

He was searching desperately, but he had nothing to go on. He kept running, ducking into corners, hoping to see a girl with brown hair or hazel eyes, but there was nothing. Nothing but the wind whispering his name.

 

In a moment of clarity, he called Chewie. His uncle would know what to do.

 

The phone rang twice before it was answered by Chewie’s gruff, “Hello?”

 

“Chewie! Rey’s been kidnapped, and I have no idea where she is, or how to find her, and I’m scared, and freaking out--”

 

“What?!” Chewie interrupted. “What do you mean Rey’s been kidnapped? Weren’t you watching over her?”

 

_That hurt._

 

He supposed to be watching over her. She was supposed to _trust_ him, _and he let her down._

 

Tears started forming in Kylo’s eyes. He didn’t feel brave or strong anymore. He was reverting back to when he was a kid. When he was…

 

“Kid. Listen to me. You go straight to the police with this. You hear me?” Chewie growled. “It’s not worth it going alone. You have no idea who these people are or what they want.”

 

Kylo’s stomach dropped. He knew _exactly_ who had done this.

 

“Go home, Kylo.” Chewie didn’t even stumble on his choice of name this time. “Go home, and let me and Maz help you.”

 

“No.”

 

“What?”

 

Kylo growled. “I know exactly who did this, and I have no idea how to find him, but I will.”

 

“But--”

 

Kylo ended the call, and set off, more determined than ever to find his Rey.

 

***

 

He had been searching for hours. He looked in all the disgusting bars, and places where low-lifes like Plutt hung out. His only prayer at this point was that Rey was still in this city. That she wasn’t back in Arizona.

 

Chewie had tried calling him several times, but Kylo sent him straight to voicemail each time. Eventually, his uncle had stopped trying to call, but Kylo would have been stupid to think that Chewie would stop looking for him.

 

He just hoped he found Rey before Chewie found him.

 

He stopped to look into one of the sketchiest places yet, when he heard a young woman screaming. His whipped around to see a girl with brown hair being shoved into a truck.

 

“Rey!”

 

Kylo was desperate. And he was stupid.

 

He ran towards the truck, knowing there was very little chance that he’d be able to rescue Rey by himself, but willing to try anyway.

 

The door slammed behind Rey to keep her in the car. The man turned away with a triumphant grin on his face.

 

Kylo nearly tripped over his own feet.

 

That was the man who was trying to flirt with Rey at the restaurant. He must of followed Rey home and found out where she was hiding.

 

The man saw Kylo sprinting towards him, and his eyes widened in recognition and fear.

 

“You!” Kylo shouted, coming closer every footstep.

 

Before he could land the first punch on the man, a blinding pain on the side of his head, dropped him like a rock. He tried fighting off the incoming darkness, noticing a familiar smirk above him.

 

“Nicely done, Teedo.”

 

Then everything fell to blackness.

 

***

 

He awoke to droplets of water hitting his face. He couldn’t tell where they were coming from, just that they were steady. A gentle sob convinced him to crack open one eye. Sitting above him with her hands tied behind her back was Rey. His little mystery.

 

He struggled to open both his eyes and sit up, but Rey quietly shook her head no.

 

“Rey?” he croaked.

 

“Shh! They’ll come back in here and knock you out again if you aren’t quite!” Rey hissed at him.

 

Her eyes were still full of the tears she was bathing Kylo in earlier.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Rey softened a tiny bit at his sincere whisper.

 

“No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “But it is better now that you’re here.”

 

She looked horrified at her own words.

 

“That’s not what I meant! I wish you never ran after me! I wish you just left me alone that day in the rain and let me die!”

 

Each sentence that she whisper shouted at him, was a dagger to the heart. His Rey. His little mystery was… mad at him for trying to save her?

 

“Rey…”

 

“No, Kylo. Now I have to worry about getting us both out of this mess, and not just me.”

 

She paused and looked over at him. His mouth had fallen open in disbelief.

 

“I am sorry for getting you into this mess.” Another tears escaped her eyes and rolled down one pale cheek.

 

Kylo didn’t know how to feel or what to say. He didn’t get the chance either, because someone kicked open the door of the room they were stuck in and blinded both of them with the sunlight behind the closed door.

 

“Well, hello again. Can’t say I’m disappointed that you’re here, _Kylo Ren._ ”

 

Hux stood in front of them, grinning like a cat that just got the canary.

 

“What are you doing here, Hux?”

 

Hux’s smile turned into a nasty snarl.

 

“Silence!” He kicked Kylo in the ribs where he was laying.

 

All of Kylo’s breath left his lungs.

 

“I get to ask the questions here. Not. You.”

 

Hux was breathing hard, trying to regain control.

 

Kylo’s head was spinning from the concussion, and trying to understand why Hux of all people was here.

 

“Now. I suppose you will want to know why you’re here.”

 

Kylo and Rey warily watched him pace the room.

 

“Not that I’ll tell you, but know this.” Hux stopped his pacing and glared at the two people beneath him. “If you do not do exactly as I tell you. You will be dead before you can say ‘sorry’. AM I UNDERSTOOD?” Hux roared.

 

Kylo and Rey only nodded their heads. Kylo’s vision was spinning and he wished he could black out again, if only to escape this strange reality. Rey was silently crying again as Hux left the room, and turned her back on Kylo. He didn’t think there was anything he could say or do that would comfort her now.

 

He only hoped that Chewie would be able to find them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally have an idea of where this is going!!!
> 
> Thank y'all for all the support. I love you all dearly!!


	14. Whispered Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What are you going to do when you're trapped in the dark with the person who has become one of the most important people in your life?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this has taken so long to get out there! It's a short chapter, but it's important! I promise we'll get to the conclusion soon!

“Kylo?”

 

Rey’s quiet voice seemed to echo in the dark emptiness surrounding them. Kylo wasn’t sure he hadn’t imagined it. Until she repeated his name a little louder.

 

“Ya?” Kylo’s throat was dry around the word as he was forcing it out.

 

“I’m… Kylo, I’m so sorry,” Rey’s eyes started to tear up as Kylo shifted on his side to Rey more clearly.

 

Kylo’s heart nearly split in two seeing her hurt this bad.

 

“Shh, kid. It’s gonna be alright. I’m still watching over you. I told you to trust me, didn’t I?”

 

Rey gave a faint nod.

 

“I’m going to prove to you that you can trust me, kid.” Kylo scooted over so his shoulder was nearly touching Rey’s knee. “Do you trust me?”

 

Rey stared at Kylo near her knees and gave a faint, watery nod.

 

“Kylo?”

 

She paused as if losing her courage to say anything more.

 

“Yes, Rey? You know you can tell me anything.”

 

She heaved a heavy sigh.

 

“I know.” She hesitated again. “There’s just something that I should have told you earlier… I wish I had. I was just… scared.”

 

Kylo didn’t say anything and just let Rey tell him everything she needed to say at her own pace.

 

It was several moments of silence before Rey could continue.

 

“I wasn’t just hiding from Unkar.”

 

It felt like an elephant jumped on Kylo’s chest with that announcement.

 

When the words started again they didn’t stop.

 

“He’s my uncle. Unkar is. My parents had a lot of problems and decided they didn’t want me, so they went to visit my uncle in the States from England, brought me along, of course. Unkar was ‘happy’ that his sister had come to visit him, but I think he knew something fishy was going on when my mom and dad were so excited to be there. They had never been rich, but they had some money from my dad’s family, so they were well enough off. I was around twelve at the time that we travelled there. They started to leave me behind when they would do something with Unkar, and eventually they’d leave me and Unkar behind. It got to the point where they would be gone for a day or two without me. Everytime they came back Unkar would scream at them for leaving their ‘brat’ behind with him. He would tell them how he couldn’t take care of me, because, where they had money, he had a junkyard.”

 

Kylo could feel his blood boiling at this point, as Rey shifted uncomfortably.

 

“My parents would laugh it off like it was a joke, until it became more often they were gone then they were there. Unkar and I got into a pattern when they’d be gone. I would help him out in the junkyard and he’d give me my three meals a day. He wasn’t bad in those days,” Rey sighed quietly, “We had...fun...I guess you’d say. It was hard, to slowly be abandoned by your parents, but I had Unkar and he’d always tell me that my parents would be back and that we’d be able to go back to England soon. I think he wanted to believe that just as much as I did. He‘s never been interested in having a wife or children, so why would he want to be stuck with his sister’s daughter?”

 

Kylo shifted almost close enough to rest his head on her thigh, but she hardly realized, lost in the story as she was.

 

“Then one day it happened. My parents left again after laughing off Unkar’s concerns and just… never came back. After a month and a half of them not returning, we both came to the realization that they were never coming back to get me. They abandoned me with my uncle who had no desire to have children. He got mad. Really mad. And since he wasn’t able to take that anger out on my parents, he took it all out on me. I became the scapegoat to my parents mistakes. I’ve been punished for what they did for the last six years. It was hard to understand that my gruff, awkward uncle had turned so violent and taunting in the space of hours. I’ve come to terms with it now, but it’s still hard to understand sometimes.”

 

Tears spilled over Rey’s cheeks. Kylo rested his head on her tense thigh, hoping to offer some comfort through physical contact. When she didnt’ recoil, Kylo relaxed and focused on what she was revealing to him.

 

“But, I lived with it. For six years I learned how to read his moods and I kindof understand where he came from, not that I agree with what he did, but I can’t hold a grudge against him…” Rey trailed off for a quiet moment before saying, “Then the unthinkable happened. My parents came back.”

 

Rey heaved a sob from deep inside her gut. Kylo whispered quiet calming noise from his vantage point on her leg. Eventually, she calmed enough to finish her story.

 

“My parents came back with a son.”

 

Kylo’s heart stopped in his chest.

 

“A little thing. Had to be four or five years old. When Unkar saw them he immediately started to scream at them and call them all sorts of horrible names. But something was different with them. They were very apologetic and said they would like to see me, but Unkar wouldn’t let them. He told them I had… I had… died… They were heart broken. I tried to make myself known, but Unkar was always there to stop me when I wanted to see them. Then I realized something. My parents weren’t bad parents, they just didn’t want  _ me.” _

 

Before Kylo could say anything to deny her claim to to help calm her, the door to their “cell” crashed open.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally figured out the end of this fic, so we are nearing the end! We'll roughly have two to three more chapters!!

**Author's Note:**

> Yay or nay?


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